..The GangVani..

Wish You Were Here

2011-12-11T21:08:00.001+05:30

This song, like many other pink floyd songs, should be listened to, when high. I feel the song unfolds a totally new meaning when listened to in a state of trance. "Wish you were here" is an one-end conversation between two versions of the same person, our real selves, the one who is stuck in the quagmire of the daily life, and the higher self, the one who is outside this circle of influence of the external stimuli.
Day in day out we try to untangle the shackle life has put on us, we try to solve the mystery of the cycle of happiness and sorrow in our own way, we try to fit things in our definitions of black and white, good and bad, heaven and hell, and this constant endeavor makes us believe we can actually differentiate between every thing that surrounds us. Then comes a state which is above everything. A state of mind where nothing really matters, where words seem fake, the black and white world troubles no more and we realize how stupid we were to have cared about the small things and in the process made our lives small.
I will explain this conversation, (or monologue) from the point of view of two forms,
Form 1 - The normal us, or the conscious form.
Form 2 - The higher form, the sagacious form.
"So, do you think you can tell, heaven from hell, blue skies from pain, can you tell a green field, from a cold steel rail, do you think you can tell?" this part of the song is a mockery thrown by form 2 upon form 1. He mocks him by saying, "how silly you were to have cared about good & bad, black & white, when nothing actually matters. So what you can tell what is good and what is bad, how does it matter? that, what is good to you can be bad for me. How silly were you to have thought that you know the lines of difference, when everything in this world is absolute."
"Did they get you to trade, your heroes for ghosts, hot ashes for trees. hot air for cool breeze, cold comfort for a change, did you exchange a walk-on part in the war, for a lead role in a cage?"
We all sell ourselves everyday. To find a momentary happiness, to achieve a short-lived goal, we weigh ourselves on the other side of the balance. They trade us daily and we sacrifice in the process. We sacrifice the things we love, the things that make us the man we really are. We tie the knot so tight that we forget it chokes us dead. Here form 2 feels sorry for form 1 and he sympathizes with form 1 and asks him were you put into trade too?.
"How I wish, how I wish you were here, we're just two lost souls, swimming in a fish bowl, tear after year, Running over the same old ground.
What have we found? The same old fears.
Wish you were here.."
Now form 2 asks form 1 to set free of all the attachments that bind him to the ground and stops him from flying away. He tells him that they have lived in the same fish bowl (body) for many years and have seen the same things and have developed the same fears, but form 1 has been affected by those fears and that is why he suffers, on the other hand, form 2 remains undeterred as for him the small things in life does not really matter. So form 2 wishes form 1 to come to his state.

Disgusted

2011-12-09T20:47:00.001+05:30

I am disgusted. I feel ashamed to call myself a part of this generation. My helplessness strangles me and the fact that I am just another mute spectator to the pathetic surroundings makes me hate myself even more. The shackles that bind me under the mask called "attachment" has made me a mere puppet, who can just shrug his shoulders while watching the morning NDTV news covering the death roll by a hospital fire, and all he can do is bite the rest of the crunchy bread toast.
I cannot even imagine the pain those 89 people had gone through in the last hours of their lives. They had come to an elite city hospital hoping to get better, and they got a demon in return who strangled them right in the middle of the night and their very ICU became their own coffin. Tears fill my eyes when I see the helpless family members running madly here and there, searching for the ones who they hoped will get better the next day. The ones for whom they prayed.
This is a massacre. Who are we blaming? Does putting a few men in jail help the little boy who have lost his father, the husband whose wife was expecting a baby? Does protesting against the ruling government help either? Opposition blames State, State blames Center, Center expresses shock and despair and an ex-gratia is announced for the family members of the deceased and the case is closed. We move on in our lives and everything else seems normal. The authorities get over cautious for a few days and a few more hospitals are searched and a few licences are cancelled and we wait with baited breath for another mishap to occur elsewhere so that the focus shifts to something else. What A Shame. What A Shame.
This is not just another mishap. This cannot be tagged "just an accident" and be made invisible. This should not be.

Thou Ball is back on thy foot??

2011-09-18T15:55:00.001+05:30

Bengalis have a special inborn affection for football. And being a bengali same was bound to happen with me. I was never an avid follower of the games be it national or international, I never kept track of the EPL or the players but I loved playing football and recently found out that I still do.

Job takes away a lot of things from us. We tend to forget things we love doing, and become machines in the hands of the protocol. Our mind seldom pictures anything outside the regular clockwork. Some of my friends still pursue their interests in spite of being tied by a regular office schedule, for which I always appreciate them from my very inside.
Ever since the news of the inter-department football tournament started diffusing in the air, I was looking forward to it with great anticipation. And this friday was our first match, and yesterday was the second match. Let me tell you the results first. We won both the games. Both 1-0.
It was a perfect way to vent out all the negative energy accumulated during this entire week.
Friday's match was against RLBU. The team was desperate to win the match as it was their second and they had lost their first match. So a lot of pushing and pulling and sliding and sledging were on the cards. And on the other hand, out team was completely new one, with 4-5 players joining the seniors who had played together last year. Whatever it was after an intense first half both the teams were tied at 0-0. After the half-time we got more of the possession as the passes went straight to those for whom they were meant to be. Someone from the other side had kicked the ball out and it was our turn to throw. It was about 15 yards from their goal and I decided to throw inside the D so that someone could head it past the goalkeeper. Harsharan came in front and asked for the ball, I threw it to him and he gave it back to me. Without stopping it I kicked it inside the D area intending to find Sudeep Sir (an expert header). But the shot misfired and it seemed as if it was headed outside. Someone from the other team even shouted "Abbe chod de, bahar jaa rhi hai". But quiet amazingly and reminding us of the Ronaldinho rainbow kick, the ball dropped just enough to pass through the upper right corner. 1-0. It was an amazing feeling.It was like an unexpected guest had bought you your favorite gift. After that we whiled away the time by passing the ball among us and defending the lead. Finally we won.
Yesterdays match was against LTMHI. The Tamil brigade. We had earlier faced them in our second cricket match in which we were beaten quiet comprehensively and ousted from the tournament. It was time for some revengeful action. They are among the fittest employees that LnT Faridabad has and it was going to be a strong challenge. Thanks to our proactive and agile goalkeeper, the first half went goalless with the ball meandering in our half. The second half started with a new formation and a goal came in no time. Partha passed the ball inside D from the left wing and Nishant gave the crucial finishing touch and GOALLL!!..
We knew we had won as our defense was formidable when all players got back. The rest of the time was passed around just like the ball.
Football inspires me. That first drop of sweat from the side of the ear and feeling it flow down to the shoulders knowing that many more are going to flow and wet me up to get me going and snatch the victory inspires me. I hope the story of success continues in the next matches.
Adios.

The Train Rolls on

2011-09-17T22:36:00.001+05:30

Witnessed a funny event today while coming back from office. The Delhi Metro rides have never bored me because of various reasons. I like watching new faces everyday, at every station. I love the way people get in and get out at Central Secretariat to Jahangir Puri line, like its the job they were destined to do and they can't miss a single second, I like watching the lone girl stuck in the general not-exclusively-for-women compartment and the amount of attention she gets from the fellow men passengers, I like it when people fight with the indifferent guys who sit shamelessly in the ladies seat even while watching an old woman standing nearby and rest only when he gets up making a silly face of a notorious infant caught red-handed. There's so much to observe in the Delhi Metro.
Coming back to the topic. A few days back during my visit to Mumbai I had the chance to book a ticket in the very popular Mumbai Local aka Mumbai Suburban Railway. I was stunned to see that no one cared to see what laid inside my bag, or my pockets. I didn't even go through a metal detector even once and I was traveling in a train carrying around 4 thousand passengers. I was shocked to see the lack of care specially after a series of bomb blasts a few years ago. Its not a surprise that the terrorist attacked the trains as its a safe place to hide any ill motives as everything will go unchecked and its also not a surprise that Mumbaikars feel unsafe at public places.
Anyways Delhi Metro doesn't leave any stones unturned to ensure the safety and each and every passenger is checked thoroughly before he gets an entry. Today while coming back, I had just closed my eyes and didn't know when I fell asleep.Suddenly I heard a loud noise. Adrenalin woke up. It was a bang. Something had exploded. This caused the others to get up as well. Two policemen came running from nowhere. The reason behind the blast was a small boy who had just boarded the train from Nehru Place and sat on his plastic bag containing something soft as he couldn't find any seat. As all the eyes were hitting upon him he meekly looked at the policemen and out came his docile explanation, "Panni fatt gayi sahab".
It left a smile on everybody's face and someone shifted a bit to make space for the kid.

Times they are really Changing

2011-09-17T00:01:00.001+05:30

Alright. I find absolutely no reason to post such an abstract article (as it seems now at least) in such a place where most of the readers won't mind reading after a few lines but I just feel like doing so. The information may be specific but the experiences may be shared by many of us in some way or the other who have freshly stepped into the leather shoes of Job.. especially engineering..
The last week has been the most hectic week of my life.. (kindly stop reading if you find your interest fading)

No seriously, even while preparing the third and the fifth semester syllabus in a single day, my eyes didn't get so weirdly tired that everything they see seem related to the work in hand. While in hostel, I used to tell myself that these tough times of engineering will pass once I get into a good job, but times have changed. (for better or for worse that needs to be perceived.)
I don't want to crib about my job, no, no, this is not that sad kind of a thing that happens to people where they feel stuck to the thing they hate and are forced to perform according to someone else. I don't want to repeat some of my mates and don't want to sound like a loser would do. What I want to point out is how does one feel when one wishes to do a job and then finds difficult to make it through? How does one feel when he solemnly take the responsibility and then think how will I be able to finish this fuck?. Well as I type this, I feel things were not that bad at my end.
Well, I designed my first foundation today (effectively), and Man it took me 25 long days to do it.. Specially the last week I felt the life being sucked up in style from my life with the comments from my senior, "Take it as a challenge Gangeyyo" making a very little change with the motivation. I felt like giving it up many a times but the ego did not permit. So lumping the information, stretching the upper limit to an extent that it pains, getting to hear "Have you forgotten us?" from parents over the phone, the return journey in the last metro, I somehow managed to complete the design drawings and send it today.
Well the experience was good to say the least. Apart from the engineering, I came to know about many people who make the organization what it actually is. Some people stay reluctant to do a certain job, some co-operate, some pass on the responsibility and some feel eager to explain you what they know and a smart worker is the one who can extract and utilize each of the traits to the maximum and get the job done accordingly. That is precisely how the organization works.
And as I type the last lines of the paragraph, I don't feel that bad anymore.

Wish they Cared

2011-09-11T22:03:00.000+05:30

How silly does it seem!!.. a blast rips off the judicial headquarters of the nation's capital and the very next day terrorist organizations queue up to take the responsibility as if it was an act of pride.. The helpless government and security system can do nothing but mark the claims as invalid.. Do we even realize what has this sorry tale unearthed? No one is afraid to bomb an Indian high court. There are people who want to be part of the mass Indian killings that took place.. As if there's a credit rating system going on.. "Okay your bomb has killed 15, you get 10 points", "okay it killed 2, you don't even qualify",,
The open mockery is relaxing in a jail right now, with crores being spent for protecting the safety of his killer ass.. A man with a gun caught red-handed while open firing at human beings has been given the privilege of judiciary, of prosecution.. You are blind if you see fairness in this process.. How can he even be allowed to eat our food, reach our courts. How can a mass killer even be allowed to breathe free??.. I fail to understand.. And what this has caused is pretty clear in front of us..
Even if they catch the master-mind with the shabby sketches released, what will they do with him? They will try them in the same high court and then let their cases be heard. If we do so, I am sure we will not be doing justice to anyone.. The UN may appreciate, but all the member nations will laugh at us beneath the painted veil of admiration.
However unjustified the US action seem to be, but they have made sure they defenestrate the Al-Quaida from the face of the earth.. They have made sure they kill the boss and the world watches with bated breath. They have made sure that Osama becomes the most wanted terrorist. But we can't even find the names of those who actually did the heinous act in Delhi last week. We have 2-3 responsibility claims and thats all.
I hate to feel insecure in my own country.

The Rock is Back

2011-07-20T01:25:00.000+05:30

well well.. let the clouds pass away.. let the birds fly away to their respective dream jobs and let the little school child make that incorrigible mistake while tying his shoe laces.. but what drives the bullock cart forward is not that shitty old wheel but the smell of clay.. I may not be making any sense to many, but what A superb feel...

As you tune in the guitar to the amplifier kept very close to your eardrums along with the rear-drums and you change patches to reach the desired tone and holding the strings tight you get up, breathe and get your ears ready to hear that very first strike.. the very first sound that comes out ad you make your presence felt in that world of yours and raise that middle finger to all the crap that has come your way, what A feel..
Courtesy L&T, rather some beautiful people in L&T, the Rock is back..
Its only the second day that we've played in a sound-proof heaven of a room but it has already set my pulse rating.. 21st July will be the day, when, if everything goes according to the plan, we will play in front of a good 900 people as a Rock Band.. The Curly Bros.
Very much, Beryy Much, looking forward to it!!..
PS. Anamol, Sharique and Nijeesh dude... \m/

Drops of Pleasure

2011-07-10T12:24:00.000+05:30

I absolutely love rains..
The very sound of drops from heaven quenching the thirst of mankind gets on my pulse..
The petrichor leaves me with a feeling of pious well being..
A few days back I had updated a status in FB, saying that rain has got to be the oldest form of entertainment and the most trusted source of pleasure and now that line comes back to me..
How true is that!!..
And though the Sunday wasted (read the previous post about plans), but thats alright.. The very sight from my caged balcony of the drenched Anand Vihar gives me a high.. I can continue to watch the same sight for hours and hours and that would mean a holiday well spent..

I remember during my school days, my mum used to put an umbrella in my bag during the rainy season.. The umbrella which was never taken out.. Gaurav and I used to flunk our parents protection plans and flout our heroic gestures by getting wet in our hip Ahlcon uniforms with our colored badges shining, and walking with our heads held high on the road from the petrol pump to Kaushambi when others used to wait under the sheds for the rain to get over..
That feeling... those innocent smiles and stupidity,.. i miss them sometimes..
Happy Rains !!..

PS: Gaurav, gotta tag you dude.. badi yaad aayi achanakk..
Take Care people...

Mother Do you Think

2011-07-10T09:53:00.000+05:30

A lazy Sunday morning....
Even the cup of tea seems deeper... Sundays generally start with a plan and generally end with a sullen sombre feeling of working through the entire week..
But as of now.. its a lazy Sunday and I will laze around..
'Mother' by their excellency Pink Floyd is a song that sells peace.. and we buy it.. (quiet anti-Megadeth)..
It leaves me with a super duper feeling of calm and I play it in loops again and again..
Listen to know what I exactly mean..
Take care people..
Happy Sunday

Shhh

2011-07-09T22:00:00.001+05:30

Where are the words? Where are the thoughts?. Where am I?

I often ask myself why have I stopped blogging? Why I have stopped sharing and posting random articles on randomest things occurring around?. Sometimes I feel that the think-tank has emptied...

sometimes I think too much finding it difficult to cope and resist the inevitable to happen, and sometimes too less just letting everything happen and silently observing the stories unfolding in front of my very eyes....

The latter grows dominant with every passing day and thats why I think I have stopped blogging...

This is a change, and I guess this change happens to almost everyone..

There comes a phase in life where we feel we can control everything happening to us.. Our actions are based on a number of choices and curved by the ones taken by us after judging all of them with our respective intellect...

We get a huge liberty to decide what we want and how amazingly, even trivial things matter..

And like many phases, that too passes away..

And then comes the part of hard ground reality.. The sad part, the tough part which tells you how you are one among the thousands and thousands of similar people, some better than you, some worse...

How hard you try to avoid the mechanical nature of your day but breathe a sigh of disgust every night thinking about the life you lived .. The part which punches out the blind imagination and conveys in the rudest possible way that "Nothing is under Your control.. You ass"..

I sincerely hope to pass away this phase too.. and very soon..

Take Care people!!!

I know thats not right

2011-05-26T21:45:00.001+05:30

The human character, however sophisticated it gets, is mired by the natural penchant for irregularities. Being stable, that too for long is not among the rampant distribution of WBC and the RBC in the volatile mixture of our life in the extreme right color of the spectrum. We breathe inside the covered sheets under the thralldom of Entropy, which roots out of the thermodynamic text books of class XIIth Physics and grows into us, without even letting us know. The randomness, the irregularity is the ultimate answer to the ultimate question. Who says, its 42?.. its Entropy.

By that I mean the natural desire to do wrong things, or not to do things in the right manner. How easily a well educated man (at least looking like one) defies the green light and flashes his insouciance about the rules and crosses the road with a slight waiver his royal hand, expecting the kilometer long chain of cars to stop just because his lazy ass cannot wait at the other side till the light turns red. I sometimes feel like slapping one or two of them. These irritable little creatures are actually the ones who causes harm. The ones who know the rule and yet commit a mistake just for the sake of a minutes convenience are the demons of the society. It is for them that the hurdles are brought up in lush green fields. It is for them that a 50 crore foot bridge remains vacant while the road below is clogged with cars because people don't have time or patience to climb up. I hate those kind of people and I hate myself for not being able to do anything. I tried to stop one of the passerby who tried and to conjure the art of crossing road with a single waiver of his w-hand. In reply, he said , "arre bhai, sabb chalta hai".. and quiet easily he crossed the road without hearing the silent curses of the drivers who had to stop.
This is the case every where.. Not only in political matters, but also in our personal lives, I believe its in our very nature to be unclean and disorganized. I get reminded of a hindi chapter, "naakhun kyun badhte hai" according to which there resides a devil in each one of us, which keeps us reminding of its presence every now and then, but it is the man in us who finally triumphs.
Well I may be too pissed off to write about this small incident, but when you come to think about it, it is actually a matter of grave concern.
Well.. I expect the better educated ones reading this are the ones who disparage such acts of intellectual's stupidity and spread the word.

An epigamic experiment

2011-05-20T20:39:00.000+05:30

The Drill

As I stomp down the ropes of venality,

feeling like a droll and challenging the innate agoraphobia

with the drops of sweat emanating from the glands of my forehead,

trying to cool off the monster inside,

I try to cull the broken pieces to balance myself on this tight rope and

look forward to the destination which seems more kabbalistic with every passing day.

The inchoate cry of the distant dream beckons a lot

A lot of attention, but then suddenly,

with a single burst of the sullen sky, things fall apart.

Things get washed away..

And a new day rises, from the east of the chimerical grin..

From the collusion of the difference..

From the dearth of temerity..

I search for a company, not to share the hapless flame

But just to know..

Because it hurts even more if you know you're the only one hurt..

Strange am I to do things that I know shouldn't be done..

Stranger I am, doing it again..

But will I ever try to look inside and kill the demon?

The demon which stymies the growth of God?

The demon who feeds from my blood and flesh?

Will I ever try to kill you demon?

A demon that has become my very own loved part?

United Breweries.. ;P

2011-05-08T22:37:00.000+05:30

Sometimes you have to crush good things to get something better...

talking about pent up emotions is a big deal indeed.. Because its never easy to clear a dirt so consolidated that it has become a part of your body.. Its like bursting balloons inside ones artery to prevent one from myocardial infarction.. But its something that needs to be done anyways to continue living..
Communication is a weapon God has given us to remain light weighed.. otherwise why the hell did some undressed, meat eaters find the need to draw stupid pictures upon their cave walls.. have you ever wondered?. why didn't they find anything worth their time?. were they stupid?. No they were not..They wanted to communicate, not only within themselves, but also with their future generations.. they wanted to put their points forward.. wanted to feel and considered important...
With time, our emotions have evolved as well.. We have started to feel more pain... I sometimes wonder why has polygamy has become more or less obsolete these days, is it because of the law or because the 1st wife has become more vocal about her feelings, sharing her only husband with another woman.. This is why communication has gained a lot of importance.. pent up emotions are not kept in the interior anymore.. they are conveyed at the right time, and to the right ears..
However difficult it seems, we should let our feelings vent out and let the other person know about our preferences.. otherwise even an insignificant small conflict today may result in a catastrophe tomorrow and we will reach a point of no return.. a point where every feeling ceases to strike the right chord... we should by any means avoid that situation to grow.. cut the problem in the bud.. And I believe that the united brewery of pain and sorrow, will be cherished for the times to come..
So Lets Speak Up..

The Year Ahoy!!

2010-12-26T13:34:00.000+05:30

often this happens that I think of something.. and end up compacting it to a few lines, which finally ends up in my face-book status.. And I hate this.. The love for embellishment, gratuitous stretching of trivial things goes to the backseat due to this impolite predilection of mine.. But still man moves on with whatever he has and cares a little less about his liking and his true purpose of being.. In the pursuit of placating his circumstances he procrastinates what he really wants to do.. So face-book will gleam on..

Before I deviate, the fundamental purpose of this post is to remind me of the happenings of this year.. If I have to make a list of happening years in my life, 2010 has a place at the pinnacle.. Getting the first job after a series of rejections, the year brought a lucky charisma with it.. For the first time life got bigger.. Life went outside the pre-defined boundaries.. Into an unknown.. I had to let go off all my inhibitions.. The magnifying glass through all my actions were studied went missing.. The controls were broken.. I landed in Vadodara in July.. The place served like a nice resting ground for the adventures that were about to follow.. There we wrote the song “Lets just do it yaar” which marked the beginning of The-series of compositions... Have you ever imagined yourself put into an exile??.. If not, then how about imagining yourself having fun in an exile??.. We packed our bags and went off to Neyveli, a small town near Chennai.. What followed was THE most exciting phase of my life.. Boozing uncontrollably at Pondicherry.. Getting dumbstruck at Ooty-beauty.. Nature fierce at Hogenakkal falls.. ghastly Pichavaram backwaters.. Shining heart Bangalore.. Never before had I travelled so much in such short span of time.. The trips were fascinating because they were ill-planned.. We decided everything then and there.. nothing was planned.. our next move was known to none of us.. Then I came back to Delhi after my final Department allocation and till now I am licking my mum’s food off my fingers daily and reviewing RCC structures in the office..

2010 is about to end and I hope 2011 gets me some stability and makes me a little more introspective and insightful..

Preposterous Malfunction

2010-11-17T20:40:00.001+05:30

This incident happened to one of my closest friends.. and since he's too shy or rather ashamed to disclose this in public, I put this up before he files the copyright...(he doesn't have a blog anyways..) let it be a narrative.. and a piece for grammar-spelling-non-perfectionist.. :P

WHY??.. just why do I love cycle rickshaws??..

It has to be in my genes..

I and Mansi have been dating for past 7 months.. ummm.. yeah... 7 months and 22 days.. people at my place know that I have been subjected to something new.. My frequent mood swings.. the phone glued to my ear.. the not being so cool anymore thing.. My sister never misses to pull my legs on occasions I show total dumbness.. She expects that I retort, just like the way I used to do.. She expects some reaction out of me.. Why does everybody expect reaction out of me??.. Can't I be stable??.. well.. so she expects some reaction or funny words on which she can laugh the entire day... Well I love my sister,.. but those words don't come out anymore.. Shit comes out in place of words..

just like it came out of the rickshaw-wala..

lets come back.. to the scene.. no.. later,, lets build the scene..

So the thing I told you about.. Mansi and I have been dating for a long time now.. We are good people you know.. the ones with all the love involved.. We make sure that we say I Love You to each other at least thrice everyday.. I wonder how people in the west handle dating, without even saying I love You.. In my case, Mansi didn’t even agree to meet me for a coffee until I proposed.. But the sad part is, coffee never graduated to anything else.. I was getting bored of Baristas and Lavazzas and CCDs and everything.. Even though I couldn’t tell her this, but I was kind of getting bored with everything around.. I missed the fun me..

Coffee never graduated.. And I should have stopped the rickshaw-wala well before..

Yeah..

“Kill me or Kick me.. but please kiss me once..”, I pleaded..

God knows from where I got that line.. and so, it didn’t work.. we were sitting in the Barista at Janpath.. Even the Manipuri waiter knew my name.. and hers too.. Mansi madame.. and bhaiya.. I once asked him to call me sir.. and in lieu of that he demanded some extra tip.. Bhaiya sounds cool isn’t it.. We have been fighting over some a very meagre topic.. “Why I hate bananas??”.. and because of this, I Love You was said only twice, the previous day.. So madam was hot.. She is!!..

I had thought about this conversation before in my mind and I was expertly steering it in my accordance..

“Nhi Yaar.. No kisses.. I don’t like it.. You asked me to hold hands, and I did na???.. Now kiss??.. Its a big step Pratap..”.. she said with a simple gesture of the most beautiful hands and minimal movement of those heaven eyes.. I get caught and bowled every time.. But not this time.. I was the driver here...

“Big Step??. No I don’t think so.. Our minds and our souls have accepted each other.. Now Body!!”.., I said with confidence in my voice..

She started laughing.. she choked.. she coughed.. she laughed again.. but in a majestically beautiful way.. She was again deviating me from my seriousness.. But not this time...

I was not moved.. I didn’t laugh at all.. not even a smile.. Instead I looked straight into her eyes and said..

“I Love You Mansi, and I love you a lot..”.. I said like I mean it.. I MEAN IT..

Her smile vanished.. She must have been stunned at the sudden seriousness of the situation and the person in front of her.. She looked innocent and was clueless of what to say and what to do.. I felt like kissing her right on those artistically carved lips then and there..

“Hmm...” was her reply... another imaginary kiss..

“okay.. A kiss is fine.. Its not that I haven’t thought about it Pratap.. but I don’t want to do it in a public place.. I want it to be special for both of us.. I want it to flow naturally.. and then only we can derive the required pleasure out of it..”. she said as I was planting my 53^rd kiss..

I really didn’t listen anything after the first line.. I had been successful to drive her safely to my den.. I just watched her.. Like those desperate housewife’s husband in blue line busses.. Meaningless ogling.. and I didn’t feel cheap at all..

So of the many topics we discussed about how this lack of kissing is resulting in the increased frequency of our fights.. and how to kiss.. and when to kiss.. where to kiss.. everything bore fruits...

It was decided that I will go to her place the next day when her parents go out to attend her cousin’s marriage.. She will stay back at her place.. I was overjoyed.. I called up Gangeyyo and narrated him the news.. He didn’t want to listen but I was heavily overjoyed..

Her parents were supposed to leave home at 7:00 pm..

I couldn’t have wasted even a single minute.. I got ready.. Gelled my hair.. Perfumed my armpits... :P.. ( am I not descriptive!!), got kiss ready..

So now...

The scene....

I got down at RK Puram bus stand at 6:45.. I knew I was early and I waited for her call signalling her parents exit from the crime scene.. They didn’t get out till 7:15.. and I hated waiting.. She called and the light turned green..

I took a rickshaw.. and his name was criminal.

I gave him the address and he said he knew it..

He said he knew it...

Never did I imagine that if something is not to happen at all, then its impossible to make it happen by force.. if coffee doesn’t want to graduate, we should be satisfied with it..

Mr. Criminal( call him C) stopped at a red light.. and a car stopped just beside us.. he looked at the address page and asked the gentleman in the car about it.. He read it twice and looked at me.. the light had turned green by then and he gave the paper back to C and asked him to stop after the red light.. I admired the man.. He had an overwhelming willingness to help after all.. Then he got out of his car and asked me to get down.. I got down and he asked for what purpose do I need to visit this house.. The question was funny.. I thought about telling him the true purpose but god didn’t want to screw me to that extent.. I asked him why was he so curious to know.. and while asking this, I didn’t display my politeness.. He took out his phone and dialled a number.. While the phone rang at the other end, he said the most terrible words I’d ever heard in my life..

“It’s MY house”..

Hells broke loose.. I started sweating in that cool November evening... Mansi picked up.. Her voice sounded good.. He switched the loudspeaker on and stared at me..

I was not in a position to make sense of whatever that was going on.. I surrendered my fate to the one who wrote it.. Mansi said I was Pratima’s brother, who needed to borrow some books of 3^rd semester.. I was thrown in the backseat of his car.. C was paid less.. I shouted all those slangs they teach during ragging.. I smeared him with the best known bad words.. but silently.. he was smarter than Mansi’s father and I think he got hold of whatever that was going on, judging by the sudden mood swing I had.. It showed on my face..

We reached the “Gupta’s”.. She brought me a glass of water.. I think she smiled once and her eyes were teasing me... I kissed her again.. I just couldn’t stop.. I smelt like a perfume factory and looked like a party freak contrary to the surrounding I was in.. This is what is called Weird.. I asked for another glass of water and received another smile.. She got another kiss..

Mr Gupta dropped me at the same red light from where he picked me up..

As I took another rickshaw.. and asked him to take me to the RK Puram bus stop as the phone rang once again...

MANSI LANDLINE.. calling...

That thing called Miss-ing..

2010-10-27T02:31:00.000+05:30

Its nice to come back to a good place.. Isn't it?.. I visited my sweet home after a gap of about 3 months during the Durga Puja and it felt like heaven.. Literally.. All those things which seemed pretty ordinary when I used to live there, seemed very special.. I felt as if I was in a palace.. specially my people.. I missed them so much over the past 3months that when everything and everyone came back to me I was out of emotions.. a total blank.. I believe when we feel something very intensely, the brain refuses to generate the right actions.. There occurs a momentary lapse of reason.. The movie scenes loose validity and you realize that life is not about expressing how much you love my singing a song in the middle of a botanical garden and dancing to the tune with 37 co-dancers.. The brain gets numb when it feels intense pain, or love, or anything.. So nothing I had imagined happened.. I had thought that I will break into tears after seeing them in the airport and so will they, but a daily soap did not follow.. They were happy and I was happy.. too happy to cry.. and the one week of my stay there was not enough to get me off this feeling..
well coming back to the point...
We are leaving Neyveli next week and there is an unsaid emotion in everybody including me.. just in my case the emotion is not untyped.. well.. I accept that I will miss Neyveli.. The thing or the factor that makes it so hard to express this simple thing is we, ourselves.. We had hated this place right from its first sight.. Even though it was 11:30 in the night.. even though there was nothing bad in it, but still, Neyveli bore all our frustration and anger of going so far away from family.. We all had our own reasons to hate this place.. Some did not like the people, some could not accept the idea of attending a college once again.. some cursed the food, some faced problems with their flush in the latrine and all their anger were thrown at Neyveli.. and it silently bore all our anger..
But it did not take much time to tune ourselves into this city and soon we find it easier to live here and YENJOY..
you never know how a thing can touch you or attach you to itself.. human nature makes us hate it based on the first impression but the thing still remains and it works silently to imbue itself to the very existence of mankind till the point when separation becomes painful..
will miss neyveli..

Confessions of a Lazy Ass

2010-10-22T03:49:00.002+05:30

With a serious hope that the newly designed template will draw my own interest towards my own blog, I start writing this piece.. Dunno how far will this go...

Sometimes when I walk back from the main market with Ketan to our guest house, and we both ponder about the things that has happened to us over this short period of time, I feel amazed.. A boy who hadn't even stepped out of the circle with a parents-decided radius, was roaming the streets of a remote area, a place never heard or thought about.. Gujarat, Neyveli, Puducherry, Ooty, Hogenakkal, Bangaluru... I can now proudly say, I have been to places this all time.. and it feels like I've been doing this for a long time..

Well.. for those who care to know, or by mistake has reached this place (my untouched blog), for your information, I am in a place called Neyveli.. Its in Tamil Nadu.. 4 hours from Chennai.. And I have been here since September..

The blogging is gone.. And the credit goes to Facebook.. All that comes to my mind.. (he he... all that).. goes to the status updates.. Now who will care to open another tab.. another website.. and log in once again... and then type a full big post.. then care for the grammar and the spellings..??.. a BIG task.. I did not.. I preferred the easier one.. so .. whatever pours, sours facebook..

I have got a new companion.. and let me tell you, she ( i prefer calling it a she) gets a huge amount of attention.. I just cannot get over her.. She keeps me busy all the time and doesn't even let me sleep at night.. Mr. Dell got me mine.. :).. I waste my time with pride.. I indulge in non-sense with the minimum possible guilt..

I will be in Delhi for the whole of next month.. We are leaving Neyveli on 3rd November for another training at Faridabad from 8th.. So very much looking forward to it.. and also looking forward to some more posts..

good bye..

Here I am..

2010-08-11T22:41:00.000+05:30

Hello blog.. This is my first post from the land where the first post office in India was set up**.. And I was waiting for a long time to get some free time to sit and pen some words for this darling blog of mine.. so here goes Here I am..
Well. to start with, Vadodara is a nice place.. Right from the first argument with the autowala, to the chat with my office bus conductor, I find this place strangely homely.. peace loving teetotalers show respect to the father of the nation by setting examples of politeness and non-violence.. No one shouts, no one fights, girls roam around freely even at 11 in the night (a feat that can only be imagined in saddi Delhi)..
People will talk in their mother tongue as if you are one of them and it feels odd to say.."uncle, gujrati nahi aati"..
The place where I live is called Fatehgunj.. its well connected to the other parts of the city.. We take auto rickshaws to tread places and till now I haven't paid more than 50 rupees to any one of them... another impossible feat in saddi Delhi.
It rains like anything in this otherwise dry state.. It drizzles day and night.. The sun has only some up twice in these two weeks.. We have actually counted that.. TWICE.. no kidding.. The 7 Seas mall is a 5 minute walk from the apartments and it has a multiplex called Fame.. This Fame has a weird thing about itself.. They extend their intermission to more than 15 minutes and in those 15 minutes, they try to sell all their food items.. "Sir, Pop Corn lenge??..".. "Sir.. Cold Drink??."... " Sir, Sandwich??..".. If you get the alley seat, you will end up cursing either yourself or that poor hocker.. Actually the system works quiet well.. The pot-bellied ones who come with their family end up buying the Cold Drink, after like 17 approaches, or 23 denials.. But Fame finds no such luck when we occupy their seats.. :).. Well.. have watched movies like Once Upon A Time In Mumbai.. OUATIM..
Well.. will write more... about all this..
my privacy has been disrupted..
take care all..

The Fifth Season- part 1

2010-06-09T23:18:00.000+05:30

With the announcement of the final closure of the resume manager being its latest announcement.. With 600 more candidates ready for their new account, ready to rub their asses off, ready to live this painful yet fascinating, fun-filled yet demanding, cruel yet forgiving one year of their lives, I get reminded of the times I spent logging in every single time with eyes full of expectation to find a new company.. open for my branch.. paying well.. with a cut-off lower than my divine 66.6%.. and signing out with a heavy heart most of the times with a hope to get a new, a favorable announcement very soon.. Before the memory fades away I want to paste those moments here so that the season stays evergreen in my blog-brain.. the season of ups and downs, the season of tears and joy, the season of feeling worthless and feeling gifted, the season of alcohol and cigarettes, the season which has changed the course of life for many, the fifth season, The Placement Season...
TCE.. Tata Consulting Engineers.. The story starts here.. Month of August.. 2009.. The fresh new formals were to be worn.. The new polished shoes were to be flaunted for the first time.. The tidily combed and trimmed hair.. The clean shave.. the brisk new male perfume.. Everything had to be perfect... The jitters, the butterflies all came into existence.. Walking into the Training & Placement hall for the very first time.. The very first PPT (seemed very boring).. The fat dark Bengali HR guy trying hard to hide his Bengali accent and managing to complete the presentation in 2 hours.. Then there was the written.. The first written exam for a job!.. The exam was awful.. I never trusted my knowledge of core and it seemed like an eye-opener.. But later on I got to know that I had been short-listed for the final interview... This news brought a wave of happiness.. Felt like I almost had the job.. Felt like I was employed.. The final interview was scheduled after 2 days and it was not easy to live those two days.. Anticipating their questions.. preparing for the answers.. Reading random articles on "Interview Tips".. (they are NOT useful).. searching "sample interviews" on you-tube.. But all goes in vain when you think a lot.. The interview did not go very well.. The interviewer was not at all friendly as they always say they are.. They attacked my knowledge of core and ruined my chances of getting into TCE.. Heart breaking.. It was the first major rejection, or denial in years.. entered my shack and removed the Tie in a flash and shouted the F-word and Felt F-good... :) One down.. more to go Gangeyyo..
BHEL.. The first of the dream companies.. The company fixed their cut-off at 65% for "god knows what" reasons.. They short-listed me.. But only called the 70-aboves for the final interview.. I never expected to get through anyway after the assault of TCE.. So I was happy that I could avoid further humiliation.. 5 people from our branch got through BHEL.. and to tell the truth, I was jealous.. !!.. 2 down..
ZS Associates.. My dream company.. Pradipt Sir's company.. Pradipt Sir was my next door neighbor during third year.. He got through ZS and I spent quiet some time listening to his experiences in the interview process.. Used to ask him the same questions every time.. just changed the format.. Like, "Yeh GD kaise hota hai??".. and "Sir, GD mushkil hota hai kya??".. and the poor fellow used to answer to all my queries very patiently.. well ZS was no joke.. It was not as easy as I imagined it to be.. Someone from the US came to present the placement talk and it was difficult to catch his words specially without subtitles.. The written consisted of two question about why ZS and why me??.. I neglected them and concentrated on the DI and the math questions that followed.. I did not get through the written.. The first two answers carried a lot of weight.. Another heart break.. This time a dream shattered.. 3 down Gangeyyo.. more to come..

Potpourri of Thoughts...

2010-05-02T12:51:00.000+05:30

Hello check 123.. check 123.. aah.. :) It's working!!.. its working!!.. After many failed attempts to be back here and blabber.. after churning the brain with a purpose to bring a worthy topic to write.. after challenging my lazy fingers, I have decided to post this. (I'm not going to draft it..whatever happens).. A lot of things have been going around off lately.. and my blogging speed was not enough to keep up.. whateva.!!.
To start with.. I have got another job.. this time @ Reliance Infrastructure..(the other was LnT).. With this, my ornamented placement season ended (was planning to write a placement account.. rather an account of my failures.. ;P).. This has added to the confusion.. Freedom of choice is not a freedom at all.. Specially for confused souls (like yours truly).. People around me(the elders) have their own point of view and they want me to work accordingly.. They never help reach to any solution.. They just say!!...
Life has strange ways to show you that Life's strange.. You prepare for something and in the end get something else.. After devoting (ideally speaking) one full year towards the preparation of MBA entrance tests and bleeding like a pig in each one of them, I got to know that I had incidentally got 96%ile in GATE.. Something must have gone wrong with the results I thought at first.. Applied in IIT Bombay and Delhi and I am excited to fly to Mumbai this 11th of May.. but not at all excited to face the interview...
The college is about to end.. The session has been extended and so is our stay in the college.. I don't expect to get a very good farewell from the college.. Don't even think there will be any Hostel Night.. Want it to end in a peaceful way and I will be happy with that..
The classes have now become a farce practice.. We prefer to stay in the hostel while the day-schis attend every class.. The project work is on hold because we just found out that the Rs 2,50,000 permeameter had not been installed properly.. Waiting for the engineer to come and fix it.. We are investigating the effects of Organic Pollutants on the permeability of fine grained soils... Isn't it fascinating??. ;)
Well.. Will write soon.. about more things..

TATA till then.. :) A lazy sunday afternoon.. !!

The new alignment

2010-03-18T19:24:00.000+05:30

""Hey.. Hey hey.. I wanna be a rockstar"".. i just love this song.. right from the very first time I heard it (2nd semester), till today, i never miss a chance to accompany chad kroegar while he sings this line.. well life has been new off lately.. being a part (however small) of a mega protest staged by the entire college and boycotting the university exams, screwing the management entrance tests bigtime, having nothing huge to do but still keeping busy precisely sums up everything thats going on..
changed the alignment of my room after a looong time.. this thing is in my genes i guess.. being the son of a gifted interior decorator (untrained but hugely experienced = my MA.. :) i get this special good feeling every time i do it.. it lifted the mood and got me down to write this piece..
"" i'll be watching.. i'll be waiting.. in the shadows.. """... love this one too..
well nothing much to blabber.. so i better save the energy and keep the place green..
take care people.. and if u getting bored.. change the alignment.. IT WILL HELP.. best wishes..

Croissant

2010-02-27T11:24:00.004+05:30

Ever since the Nescafe has been added to our daily college life, I have been wondering what is so special about this piece of bread…*CROISSANT* Is it the fancy name with the corrected pronunciation?? Or is it the soft and smooth sensation that it brings with itself.. But what I think is, it’s the unique taste that matters… Of everything that we taste regularly, nothing tastes like Croissant, except the Croissant.. Its true.. Every time it touches the taste buds, I feel something new has entered.. Something inimitable…

Well…. Pity the writers of the HT City… The celeb writers.. They seem to be more like a boy given a ginormous gift like Mercedes’ Benz on his 10^th birthday… They get a full column that features in the front page of a popular city newspaper and all they do is fill it with arbitrary stray stuffs.. Picking up random matters and prattle about it all through the column.. But they are not to blame.. They get paid for their blabbers.. Why ask them to write at all??.. I don’t think that many of us idolize them.. We can now clearly differentiate between a good film actor and a good writer.. Gone are those days when people would believe anything because a movie star vouches for it..

Everyday, we start off from our shack and return via the same road.. The road is meant to stay and we are meant to budge… It gives the sense of what is real and what is not.. We try to make the most of the time we have got, and once we return back, we realize the time just slipped away.. the way it’s meant to.. Witnessed Engifest’10 and there was not a single second that didn’t pinch to remind me that this is the last of my Engifests… I responded by crafting resolutions of having full fun.. Making the most of the time.. But when it came down to the event, it just came and went away.. in a flash.. Resolutions, Plans, held ground and we just got in the groove of the festival.. Now its’ gone.. And gone are the two months of my last semester.. and I feel like this post is going the same direction as the last.. So steering back….

I have started watching the OC (Orange County).. It’s nice.. But I often get down to envy their lavish life and their freedom.. Come on.. When I was sixteen, my mum used to stand beside, whenever there was a girl on the other side of the telephone.. and here, Ryan brings his girl friend to his room and kiss her without even caring about the unbolted door.. Two extremes of a common phenomenon.. And here again, demarcation between the real and unreal is drawn..

Well… life off lately has been like a Croissant.. soft but with a new taste.. taste of separation.. (not again!!!.. steer back).. take care people.. summer is back.. and unlike in “the OC”, it is not as welcomed here… but it’s fun to sweat out the salts..

The Sad Post..

2010-02-06T01:00:00.000+05:30

Sometimes we get no time to sit back and think about our deeds (misdeeds), our course of action gets no direction, we live each day the way it comes to us.. we stop caring about the past, about the future,.. but wait.. these words may sound familiar.. it generally follows by the very obvious line.. "Live in the present".. But that is where the problem zygotes.. that is where we deviate from the ideal intended meaning of that famous saying... This has been the case for last two months..
well.. when I sit back and think what in the world did I do in the bygone 60 days, I get many answers.. but none of them seem worthy enough to explain.. I can't even explain them to myself.. Even though I got bored every single day, but still I think that time ran very fast..
Experienced Delhi's coldest winter in years.. wore two jackets over a sweater, a shirt and an inner and looked like a swollen balloon.. got drenched in extreme feelings time and again.. took care of mum who underwent Angioplasty.. faced management entrance exams (no luck with them).. got selected in a company.. but the saddest feeling which caught hold of all other feelings was that of leaving the college in a few months time.. The four year period is about to end and this is a huge roughage fact... hard to digest.. went to college on a few occasions.. found a higher number of unknown faces.. found a newer version of college.. How true, that a college is made by the people in it.. a few years from now, my college will no more recognize me.. sob sob!!... :-(
Same feelings cropped up while leaving school and they soon vanished once I got into college.. so I hope my sobs won't last very long this time as well..
will soon post something other than this.. last sem has to rock.. and has to rock hard.. will keep posting..
adios till then..

Welcome 2010

2010-01-01T00:11:00.000+05:30

As the clock is all set to bring all it's three sticks to 12 and 2009 will just cross it's expiry period, and as the crackers outside are reciting the happy poems of many and singing good wishes for everybody, I sit alone in this room of mine thinking about the amazingly eventful year that I lived.. This was the year of love, year of heartbreaks, year of new findings, year of self realization, year of getting matured.. a lot indeed.. It had enough to be remembered forever..
Hope 2010 brings a little stability.. Gives me a nice break.. Calms me down a bit.. Takes care of Mum and Dad's health..
Even though it seems that the year vroomed away in no time, but I had a long year indeed..

My Mate.. Climate..

2009-12-21T20:00:00.001+05:30

We can holler slogans… We can march protests... Doesn’t matter how much oil is burnt everyday to prepare the multi-cuisine dishes for the delegates at Copenhagen… But when it actually comes down to caring for the environment, we shrug our shoulders.. No matter how much Aamir Khan distorts his facial features in his posters to look like a teenager, his real age is known to everybody.. No matter how much we create (or pretend to create) an awareness about protecting our climate, we all turn cold when we deal with it in our own lives.. I may sound like a stereotypical protest-ie but I just felt the urge to share a very burning incident that happened a few days ago..

Evening had arrived.. I was walking back to my home when I saw a heavy dark smoke coming from a distance.. It got diffused in the surrounding air and made it unpleasant for everybody.. The lady who was walking beside me had put a hankie on her face to cover up just like I did, and the kids of the nearby dhobi were coughing like anything.. It was indeed very disturbing.. Had it been any other day, I would have continued to my home pressing the hankie a bit tighter, but the hype created by the on-going climate-change summit pumped concern in my veins.. I set out for the source of that smoke.. A smoke not on the water!!..

I didn’t have to travel much.. The guards of the next tower were standing around a bonfire kind of a thing and rejoicing the wintry evening.. They were burning the dry leaves accompanied with plastic packets (, and many more things).. The smoke from the plastic was what was causing so much irritation.. As I approached them, I saw a familiar face.. He was from my family’s friend circle who resides in the same tower and was enjoying the fire which supplied HEAT to him.. Just as he saw me coming towards him,

Well.. Let me supply the extracts of the conversation.. though it was in Hindi, but I think I can translate this much…

Uncle X : Hey, come join us.. get some heat.. ha

Me: Thanks uncle, but I came here to put this off.. ( I did not smile.., he was expecting me to smile because he thought I was joking)

Uncle X : (after a pause of expectation) ha ha ha.. why do you want to put this thing off??. You and I live in heated apartments but look at these poor guys, they need this to stay warm.. ha ha.. (The joke he was intending to crack begged for a sense, and I didn’t smile back)..

Me: They have got their own rooms with heaters.. they can stay inside that.. Have you asked them to burn these??.. or are they burning these themselves..??.

Uncle X : Yes.. I had only asked them to burn these.. You see the leaves were thrown here… The place was looking dirty.. so I asked them to burn the leaves.. but why are you asking??.

(Game on)

Me: Uncle, the smoke is bothering everybody..

Uncle X : Bothering whom??.. I am not seeing anyone getting bothered except you…

Me: The residents of our apartment were complaining about this to the guard.. That is where I am coming from.. (Yes, I lied)..

Uncle X : Let them come to me and speak..

( I was pitying the guy.. He was an educated man, but his behavior proved otherwise.. He had lost all the respect that I had for him.. How can he be so very adamant about such a small thing.. The guards seemed to be enjoying the drama without wearing any expression on their faces)…

Me: Can’t you see.. the smoke is spreading everywhere.. Call your home and check whether they can smell it or not.. Please uncle.. ask them to put this off..

Uncle X: It will go off by itself in a few minutes kid.. Go to your apartment.. This is our apartment and our garbage.. We can do anything with it..

That did it.. I was in no way going to waste my breath on this literate illiterate person.. I gave up.. and while coming back, saw the kids of the building.. playing badminton.. I knew some of them and asked them to pour water to the fire.. I knew that they won’t do that, but still I had to vent my anger… I was feeling very sorry for myself because I was not able to persuade him… sorry for the residents who had no options but to breathe in that poison air.. Sorry for the kids who had to cough it out.. And sorry for the Earth, which had to house it’s own destroyer..

Well.. I am not suggesting any measures to protect our environment, because we have been taught about this for quiet some time now.. We have wasted enough ink answering the easy questions, “How can we conserve the Environment?” and listed many things which we never follow… But I just met an educated Indian, who by no means had any sort of concern for the Earth and had no problems holding it by it’s neck and banging it’s head against the wall.. If he can’t conserve the place, he has no right to destroy it…

This sorry observation made me recollect a picture I had seen in an art exhibition.. The picture was all black.. No colors.. No lines.. It was like darkness, poured into the blank canvas.. it was too difficult for a 6^th class student to comprehend the sense behind that frame.. But now I can very well realize where it intended to point.. The picture wore a title.. “Delhi, 2050”..

Piranha's Lounge

2009-11-28T14:52:00.001+05:30

There are things that we always wonder why happen at all... We get amazed that how can this thing happen to anyone.. But if this amazes you, you will get a shock when those very things happen to you... I don't know whether I make sense or not.. but those who have experienced the same feeling, needs no explanation of this fact.. Life shows us all.. everything that we see around, that we think has a rare possibility of happening to us, can occur any day, any time..
well.. life has been Topsy Turvy the past few months.. A lot of things happening at the same time.. A lot means a lot.. Campus Recruitment, CAT, End Semester woes, special people, special friends, everybody is letting me feel their respective presence..
Back in college, the end semester is about to end this monday.. And another herd of exams will be soon visiting.. The December opening of our college placement has been welcomed by all.. The Nescafe and the Coffe Day express have added shine to our otherwise happening hostel... They remain open till 4 in the night and the starved-due-to-mess-food and bored-of-chachi people of the college line up to fill their tummies with relatively tastier and newer food items.. Macroni, Pasta, Croissant, everything is in the offering and they ensure a visit to the ATM b4 coming to them... The exams were more like T20s.. Minimal preparation, 3 hours brain.. and done..
A holiday is on the cards.. To a calm place, thats what I need right now.. But just as the thing that I mentioned in the starting, some lines unfold their true meanings and you see yourself as a part of it's appropriateness..
"Miles to go Before I sleep...Miles to go before I sleep.."..
take care all..
love the winters..
miss the summers.. .

The Story of a King..

2009-10-17T22:39:00.000+05:30

Once upon a time there lived a king.. He was not only a king of all wealth and health, but also a king of all the pain and sorrow… He was very unhappy.. He sat and wept all the day..

What makes people gloomy??.. Not only when things go skewed and awry, but even piles of wealth stored away can make people sad…

Will the unhappiness go away??.. No wonder the king broods and wonders all the day.. But can he ever find peace if he’s busy punishing everyone or the other…

How can the sorrow go away??.. Not much of a chance if your palace becomes your prison… If the king could leave his golden throne, and get out in the fields to breathe some open air, to feel the fresh dew drops under his feet.. Then he could find peace…

Once upon a time there lived a king.. He was not only a king of all wealth and health, but also a king of all the pain and sorrow… He was very unhappy.. He sat and wept all the day..

the above content was inspired or rather translated from a song, by Satyajit Ray, in one of his marvelous movies, "Goopi Gayan, Bagha Bayan".. I can't help appreciating the great man.. The relevance of his thoughts behind the poem is truly praiseworthy...

Salutes..

(:..For you.. The girl in Green.. :)

2009-10-10T10:06:00.002+05:30

Metro from Rithala to Dilshad...

There's nothing good in it.. because there's nothing bad...

People get in and out at every stop...

And I prefer sleeping while watching this daily soap...

Rohini West.. you climbed up and sat on the seat opposite to mine...

You were with a friend of yours..and I saw your looks were just fine..

Took out a comb and you settled your hair letting it collide...

I tried to concentrate hard on the editorial and pushed my ear plugs inside...

My regular glances here and there.. they were all meant for you...

You looked back... Were you even looking at me??.. or enjoying the outside view..??.

Just as our eyes met for the nano of seconds...

I tried to look away... or to the newspaper I reckoned..

"People confuse the metro as their study room".. you said and your friend started laughing..

An open mock thrown at me??... Speak something.. Save your prestige from half-ing...

Game on.. I folded the Newspaper.. felling like the frame of Gable...

"These days people think the Metro is their make-up table..".

That worked.. you stunned... you smiled.. you did many things together, like the don of Dubai..

"Hello I am ****.. Do you live nearby??.."..

And as you asked the Uncle sitting beside you, to change his place with mine..

"No I live in the East.. Why?.. is everything fine??."..

Of the dancing dandoos that I try everyday.... When you asked, "What do you do??."..

"I write blogs".. was the answer that came out of my beak without any ado..

"Wow.. what are blogs by the way..", I didn't know that you didn't know..

"They are web spaces where I publish some appo and grappo"...

Pulbangash.. That's where you had to get down...

"So, will you write a blog for me??.".. you smiled and took your bag around..

"Sure.. Let me see what I can write for you", I said like Rushdie, like I was the only sheen...

This goes out for you girl.. The Metro girl in green...

Chapter-III- The Long Pause..

2009-09-28T12:01:00.000+05:30

The bag lied next to him… Saturdays are the best-days.. You can relax as much as you can.. You know the next day is off and you have enough time to toil for the week’s assignment.. So just sit and give yourself the time you need.. And Shekhar needed time.. He was staring at the bag, without any reason..
read more..
http://thepoppingpill.blogspot.com/2009/09/chapter-iii-long-pause.html

Delhi's Durga Puja

2009-09-27T11:47:00.002+05:30

This was the 7^th time I was celebrating Durga Puja in Delhi..

And for the first time I got an opportunity to visit the pandals other than our own colony puja..

Actually, every year we make plans to go out, but end up getting involved in the local puja.. But this year, it was unlike..

We first headed to Chittaranjan Park..

Navapalli Durgostav was our first halt.. As I started walking towards the puja, watched people stationed in lines, Bengali flowing out ubiquitously, for one pint of time I justly sensed I was walking the streets of Kolkata.. The animation, the verve, the charisma was the so alike..

The display was nice.. ...the NAVPALLI DURGA PUJA...

Then came CR PARK, Kalimandir Puja Committee’s Durga Puja.. We were greeted by the huge mass.. Had to situate in a long line, without getting tired..

CR PARK KALIMANDIR

A troop from West Bengal’s Birbhum were performing tribal dance.. an awesome performance,. I wish I could stand there a little longer, but CR Park Co-Operative Ground’s Durga Puja was next…

gigantic crowd.. long queues.. nothing could deter our spirit.. we walked slowly in the queues and reached the Pandal.. It was undoubtedly the best pratima I had seen in Delhi so far..

The insides of the pandal was decorated with sculptures and a perfect ambience was crafted.. The Pratima particularly was amazing.. it was hard to take my eyes off..

CR PARK CO-OP GROUND

Then came Chittaranjan Park-I Puja.. The arrangement was lovely.. Fighting scene between Ma and Asur was depicted..

CR PARK- 1

As we left CR Park, I was feeling fulfilled.. The Kolkata that I was missing for so many days, came banging back.. It is true that inhabitants call CR Park the “second kolkata”.. The vista, the panorama, the spectacle, the ambience, the Bengali parlance everywhere, the egg rolls, the jhalmuri, the fuchka.. everything carried the Kolkata feel.. and I had no problems being the utterly butterly regional Gangeyyo at that point of time.. I was proud to be a BANGALI.. like every other Bangali..

From there we headed to the oldest puja in delhi.. The one at Kashmeeri Gate.. It was started in 1910 and they were rejoicing their 100^th year of being… I came to know that many prominent figures were in the organizing team of the puja and even Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose was associated… We bought some Bengali CDs and books from there..

KASHMERI GATE

Next was Mayur Vihar’s Miloni.. It had been adjudged as the best Puja of Delhi… We reached there at the stroke of midnight but still found a decently full-size crowd.. The Sandhi Puja was going on and once again I could feel the Kolkata inside.. (excuse the repetitions..)..

MAYUR VIHAR'S MILONI

We came back at 1:00am.. and after six long years, I felt like I am really celebrating the Durga Puja.. I love Delhi.. :-)

Celebrations...

2009-09-24T18:16:00.004+05:30

When she comes, she comes with all her majestic aura which no one can ignore..
The celebrations, the festivals, the charm, the wishes exchanged, make these days so very special.. Special in a new way..
Well.. finally, the wait for Durga Puja is over.. Well before time, Ma Durga has come on the Earth to bless us all.. Wish this festival fills all of you up with positive energies and keeps you waiting for the next year's puja...

Happy Durga Puja to All of You.........

Gangeyyo

Chapter-II - Why does the Butter Fly??.

2009-09-20T13:04:00.001+05:30

-college??.
-course??..(must be psychology)
-year??.
-how did she get my number??..
-orkut profile?.
Shekhar didn't believe that he was actually jotting these random thigs down in his notepad.. He was a mixed bag of emotions.. He couldn't control blocking his brain with Shruti.. Her name, the only thing he knew..
read here...

http://thepoppingpill.blogspot.com/

Shifted

2009-09-06T13:23:00.002+05:30

dear all...
I will post the popping pill in my other blog..
http://thepoppingpill.blogspot.com/

and leave the gangvani alone..
so keep reading and enjoy..
:)

Chapter 1- -Why does Niagara fall??

2009-09-05T22:38:00.007+05:30

24th August, Wednesday:
Hello Diary.. Another very usual Wednesday passes by.. There is something about the wednesdays that make them very boring.. there's something wrong in the name I think.. "Wednes.." well.. whatever.. Ma woke me up at 7.. Got ready by 8 and left for college.. something happened on the return journey.. After Khanna got down at Welcome, I found a seat for myself.. A seat next to the door.. And there I slept.. I slept till the train reached Dilshad Garden.. Reached home in a very non-unusual manner.. Nothing special in the bus.. But Ma was the first one to find the change.. I was carrying a different bag.. I mean it's almost like mine.. but it wasn't mine.. I opened it up and found books of psychology.. 2 of them.. newly bought.. no marks.. no scratches.. and no names.. except the books, the bag had 257 rupees, a comb and many more things.. things bout it were enough to conclude that it belongs to a girl.. my bag didn't have anything thief-worthy.. so i was not that perturbed.. But Ma scolded me for being so negligent.. even scolded me for sitting on the net till late, for which my sleep remains incomplete... well have to sleep early tonight.. it's 10:43pm.. good night diary.. i guess, "miss bag" is also getting scolded somewhere.. he he.. good night.. :)) and yess.. please give good marks to Rahul in this semester.. bye bye..

and Shekhar switched off his laptop.. Though he thought of sharing this event with Rahul, but he had to sleep early.. and even though he wished his diary good night, but he couldn't sleep that easily.. He was thinking about her, the girl, whose bag lied next to his bed.. Will she call tomorrow??.. How will she get my number??.. How does she look like??.. Isn't there any way that I can reach her??..
and he searched the bag once again.. like for the 17th time..
no clues.. no phone number except Sheena's.. he had already tried that number and found it out of service.. but he tried again.. only to listen to the operator's voice.. he listened to the full message (for the 17th time).. both in Hindi and English..
"the number you are trying to reach is temporarily out of service"..
kept the phone down..
Miss Bag was climbing over his head.. He couldn't stop imagining the girl.. He found it very fascinating to craft a girl using the objects she uses.. a game never-played-before..
The vaseline Lipguard, helped him shaping her lips, the comb gave her long curly hairs, the fair and lovely pouch lent a fair and lovely face.. her eyes, her nose.. everything was being filled..
Though he was unwilling to admit this to himself.. though he kept telling himself that this was nothing out of ordinary.. But the voice in his head were disproving his gestures.. He was feeling awkward.. this was perhaps his closest approach to any girl.. any girl!..
Hailing from an ultra-conservative family, the word love was very very close to SIN for Shekhar.. he never wanted to be around girls only because he was never let to.. not that his hormones weren't functioning properly, but his hypothalamus was seldom excited.. The first time he saw a porn movie in Ashu's hostel room, the first fluid that came out of him was his very own puke..
so.. this unknown bag had an evident impact..
so he got up the next day.. less excited.. more hopeful.. the dreams about her had soothed him a bit.. he left the house with a strange feeling.. something in the air was different..
he hesitated to share what had happened last day with anyone.. no one noticed the bag-change.. and at around 1:30 as he was sitting with Dhawal and Khanna, his phone rang...
unknown number.. (dhak dhak)..
"hello"..
"hi.. i think i have your bag with me.. and you have mine.."
(dhak dhak)*2
"yeah yeah yeah.. i know.. i know... hello"..
"ya.. can i have my bag back?".. bold..
"ummm... y y ya.. shh.. shh.. sure.. when??. where??."..(dhak dhak)*4.."mm.. mmay i know who's speaking?".*(dhak dhakk)*8..
"Shruti"..

(to be continued...)

A Popping Pill..

2009-08-30T14:02:00.009+05:30

Prologue

----------------------------

There are times when you feel very low, when you feel that the entire world is conspiring against you, when everything you do or plan to do result in a failure even before it gets started in the right alignment...

But there are times when you feel on top of the world.. when you feel the life running through your veins with every breadth you take.. When you thank God for gifting you a splendid life.. the case with Shekhar and Shruti.. A sense of achievement when he finally held Shruti in her arms, filled his eyes with tears... The same eyes which challenged the world, challenged his own people, challenged the stringent society were now softened and calmed with the tears of joy..

"I promise I will never let you spend a single moment without that beautiful smile of yours.. I will make sure it never sways..", he whispered..

"I am happy to be with you", she replied.. concisely pretty like always..

And he hugged her even tighter.. wishing the moment never passes away.. wishing he could stop the time.. remembering the struggle they both went through to make way for this moment..

he closed his eyes with the purest of satisfaction...

(to be continued..)

As Delhi Rains...

2009-07-27T21:05:00.002+05:30

Of a variety of things I like a propos Delhi, Delhi’s extremity is what pleases me to the Boro’s coverage. If the wintry weather is horrendously chilly (.. and you have to twist the taps of your bathroom on, to see whether the temperature had fallen afar 0 degrees or not,) then be assured that the temperature in the summer will bluster you away with the never-resting mercury climbing the ever-est… and same follows in the monsoons… Ahaaa…

As the rains outside this 8 inch wall, very intentionally step to it’s 4^th hour scuttle, I can’t help getting jubilant. The view from the balcony, is quiet a sight and it was hard getting myself in, to write this. I wonder how my perspective of rains has changed over the years.. Earlier I used to think of it as foe, a problem-creating agent which will disrupt the days cricket. But this year it was a necessity…

So.. my fifth cup of tea gets drained out..(God save my complexion.. he he).. Time to go back to the balcony.. Happy Rainy Season to all of you…

PS: thegangvani has stepped into it’s second year of being.. I will the opportunity to thank my friends a lot without whom this wouldn’t have been possible.. Ohh.. Such a bigg cliché.. but really, thank you all..

The Kite Runner

2009-06-19T09:55:00.002+05:30

“For you, a thousand times over!!..”

recipe of certain expressions does certainly craft enchantment.. They glue to your sanity like they belong there.. You get instilled by the thoughts, the author wants you to.. Paralyzed by the over-flowing feelings.

Written by Khaled Hosseini, rather woven by him, this book encircles around a boy- Amir.. His growing up and the swaying proceedings around him that finally translates him into a man.

Afghanistan, as never imagined.. Love, odium, clashes, battles.. the rambling yarn has it all to court the readers, yet they seem so natural, so genuine.. Connected events of Amir’s life and his attainment of the goal, leave the reader attached to him in some way or the other.

How often we face a situation that leaves us thinking are we good enough??. We know we are noble and we are not-wrong, but the circumstances test us and we fail.. We don’t come up with the right itinerary of actions that should have been taken at that instant. It challenges our moral and derides our ethics. That changes us.

As the story unfolds, we get simple yet powerful lines like..

“There’s a way to be good again.”,

ending with an open note..

“I ran. A grown man running with a swarm of screaming children. But I didn’t care. I ran with the wind blowing in my face, and a smile as wide as the Valley of Panjsher on my lips.

I ran.”

Of all the books I’ve read till now, If I can label any book as a “must read”, then it will be The Kite Runner. Read it to know why!!..

Dhoni can't Bat Salla... obvious!!..

2009-06-16T01:06:00.006+05:30

...SUITS HIM!!.. ISN'T IT??..

The word is out on the streets now.. well observed.. established...

If Pappu can’t dance…

If Himesh can’t sing…

If Orangutans can’t fly..

And if Saitans can’t swim…

Dhoni cannot Bat…

and m sure whoever watched the T20 yesterday between India and long(est)-time-rivals England, can't deny this..

I was always two-minded about Dhoni’s batting brilliance.. While one part believed in his stats.. (the batsman with the healthy average plays good.. matter of fact everyone!!) and another part (which watched the matches and) thought.. that how come a first-rate batsman hit the ball with full vigor on the leg side, yet the ball goes grudgingly to the off??.. well..

How can a “celebrity” batsman, a specialist captain, a mutiny in Indian willow-ers, coming out to the crease with almost half the innings left, and on stage-ing till the end, making sure his country doesn’t win the must-win match (even by fluke), remain unscathed.. so here I go Mr. Dho.. (call him star and I’ll give you glasses…)

I kept on telling myself, that he can’t be such an idiot.. he must have made some strong stratagem and must be playing with a vow to win.. but as I saw the overs passing by, and didn’t discern any change of approach in our *star* batsman’s way of handling the wood, Mr. DHO-GO jst lost one half of a not-against-dhoni cricket follower…

At the end of 17^th over, I saw the opponent captain wearing a more tense look than our no-emo-for-the-promo captain… Collinwood, knew he was on the verge of wining, still made sure everything was perfect.. but our doodh-oni was as cool as cucumber… He was sure we were going to loose.. “so why take pain??”.. All I had for him were slang s!.. I was literally uttering them in a high voice.. With every planned-looking single he took, I couldn’t control my urge to hate him.. and slangs were coming out for gratis..

Well.. the way he’s always been.. “all show no skill”.. at the end he registered a good-looking crush of only 3 runs.. but had Yusuf Pathan been out(was almost slayed by a run-out.. dhoni again), it could easily have been 30… hitting his 3^rd boundary off the last delivery(-the only boundary he hit.. rest were knicks!!..) the captain walked out off Lord’s.. the same ground where India once lifted the World Cup in spite of being overly under-rated… the World Champions of T20 were literally punted out of the tournament which they(along with the whole country) believed belonged to them.. as said.. //there is a lot to cry for at the end, when the end is gloomy//… I was over-flowing with rage.. all of which cannot be described..

I turned the pages of the newspaper the next day, and saw..

MS DHONI--30 runs off 20 balls..

and I didn’t bother to read the rest.. didn’t bother to read his clarification that it’s a game, winning and loosing bear equal probabilities blahh blHHH..

And as the day progressed I learned I was not alone.. some effigies were burnt too..(not that I feel overjoyed about it).. but we all have our way to show anger.. And as the rage didn’t get any milder in 24 hours, I decided to post this..

Hope he reads this!!.

Click Here To Continue Anyways...

2009-06-06T11:17:00.010+05:30

ahh.. finally connected!!.. two months exile from the blogger's spot.. two months without the continuous exposition to the blah blah-ing world.. it felt so empty.. Well.. i finally persuaded my mother to get my mother-board fixed and here am I..

mm.. where shall i start ?.. 6th sem has gone by.. I'm finally in the final year.. Seniors have left.. The days before the exams in the hostel were indeed very specially happening.. I'm so happy for two new chirping lovebirds on the block.. (how could i ignore? whn one of them nests in the next room!!.. A+A.. he he.. ;))

I lost my darling mobile phone in mysterious circumstances.. it felt so odd when people asked,"Kaise khoya??".. and i had no answers.. for i didn't know myself how i lost it.. then came the papers.. ohh!!.. Advanced Design of RCC was the first of the fists!!.. i wud refrain from describing it.. was that supposed to be a quetion-paper for under-gradu-'ate's??.. (it ate us well no doubt).. then there were battles between the worth of studying "sewage engineering" and the same-boring-repeating inductors and capacitors with my electroniac friends.. i had a strong ground.. as the others were studying about the same thing for over 2 years.. no variation.. no changing paths.. but here we(civil-ites) were designing western and indian POTS for 'healthy' sewering.. ha ha.. the last exam on 21st marked the beginning..(in super senses) heeh..

The temperature of Delhi is reaching new mercuric heights.. having to deal with an on-site construction in these super-standard conditions, is what I'm getting trained on .. well the office work seemed very funny in the first week.. there are some people who i guess have been hired jst to sit there.. I saw one of them finding all the pleasure in the world in jst refreshing his desktop again and again.. like around 15 times.. When he was satisfied with his ultra-refreshed desktop and saw me looking at him(was i smiling??.), he opened the 'my computer' and closed it and repeated the cycle.. Oh boy!!.. that man really had a huge role to play for his company..

I'm reading "The Kite Runner" these days and wish it never finishes.. so have further reduced my slow reading speed.. And Green Day's 21st century breakdown is on download.. 21 Guns is a very good track indeed..

well.. will soon blahh some-thing about sum-thing beacuse i want to be some-thin..

PS.. @swayam.. i searched for the advaita downloads a lot.. didn't even get a single track.. help me out!!..

TIP OF the EVENING by baba AAM-SEV::- if you want to bring about a change in your way of living, go and change your guitar strings.. and if you don't have a guitar, change your Agarbatti!!.. keep the spirit alive.. :) khao mango..jiyo apple..

god bless..!!

Kudos to Kudos!!..

2009-03-27T19:43:00.003+05:30

Why??.. Again?.. just why??..
march inside THE class tenth… the first life-size exam of your life, and you get to know that yours is the first bunch to get a fresh alienated syllabus… same happens in class XIIth.. Sit for the dreamt IIT-JEE and get a devil of a question paper… (Was it??.. It was more like convoluted torment agenda..).. Well.. Save your ass and get into DCE..(Semi-dreamt!!).. and after chafing that much-saved ass for three ‘learning’ years, prepare your temporal lobe to collect some perilous signals like, ”defer letter”.. “No score- no core”.. “Cancellation of offers”.. and whatnot.. I mean.. is this done??.. no..aaannnn…
Well.. life’s been grand sans these outlandish proceedings… the much puffed up Placement coordinator elections took place today, and I’m happy that someone steadfast from the hostel has claimed(almost) the much coveted post.. Murky politics, tattooed backstabs, all the ingredients were very much present this time around making the voting a delicious cocktail of emotions.. I think we Indians are born political.. It’s like our mother language.. even though you go far away and experience all the possible conditions to forget that lexis, but still, you manage to throw some words and speak it whenever you get a chance… it never leaves you.. that’s what happened.. even we are so not-political on our face, but kaboomm… we are Indians..
The much awaited, (rather dreaded) Vth semester results burst out.. I managed to score 62.51%.. Though I betted for something around 55% going by the stinky loose-motion of the exams I gave.. but I breathed a sigh of relief… only 3 guys (or 4) managed to score above 70..( I hope you are noticing the defense I intend to present, stating this very fact.. he he(blink of the left eye)haha..).. so now the Vth semi is out, we have fetched all we could, to fill into our CV barrels.. Come company, and take me.. Not my marks..(nice slogan)..
The whole process of filling the CV, getting clicked suited-up!!.. Makes me feel big.. Funny but true!!…
Well.. Nothing more to blabber.. I flushed out everything in a very short time.. The pigeon in my balcony has been successful to crack her eggs and bring out two more pigeons.. But the father pigeon is no where to be seen.. My mom calls her “khuttni”.. whatta name!!.. But I’ve got doubts about her identity as the last time a pigeon laid eggs, she was also called “khutni”.. so this fertile khutni is keeping very busy feeding her baby khutnis…
well.. have a happy rest-session.. and may god help recession…
dasvidaniya…

Bon-HoMo-EEE..

2009-01-26T01:45:00.007+05:30

Some things in life reside perpetually… even if you crave to forget them, still, they fancy remaining super glued to your grey cells.. they turn up at certain events and leave that slight grin on your face.. the grin that reminds you of how disgusted you felt, living that moment.. They are bad experiences.. you never want to live them again.. and every time that memory pops out, you are left saying, “Oh!!.. How foolish was I..”

Well.. I have been jammy enough to breathe some awful experiences.. I was caught red-handed while “using” the staff toilet(ladies) in school.. I was convicted of writing a shitty love-letter to a girl of my class, who happened to be the daughter of a senior teacher… the crime I never committed.. Words will fall short if I start mentioning all of them..

But the one who sits at the top, will surely get the limelight.. This thing happened about a year back.. so.. celebrating it’s about-anniversary, I’m going to narrate this unfortunate yet funny yet seriously disturbing episode.. it was my first encounter with a Homo…(kids.. leave the page now!.)

Winters 2007.. freshly out of the torturous third semester exams, we all were desperately trying to kill time.. have fun.. go out.. enjoy.. it’s very often that I plan an exhilarating holiday well before.. and nothing ever happens..

I met my school friends in Mayur Vihar and signed them goodbye by 7:30pm.. my exterior wasn’t that eye-catching.. Un-brushed long curly hairs were un-wholly matched by the misplaced unbalanced goatee of mine(only if you call it.. I Call It..) a bus was going to drop me at Noida More from MV.. and another would take me to my place..

The bus arrived.. jam-packed.. hardly any space to stand.. I got into the bus (I love packed out places).. I managed to stand beside the conductor’s seat, near-the-rear door.. just as the bus began to move, I raised my hand above to hold the overhead rails.. THIS was my only mistake..

Well.. my hand didn’t touch the rail first, but another hand.. There was a short baldy guy, standing just beside me wearing a Denim Jacket.. very very complicatedly designed..(Fresh out of Paris.. haah).. a jeans with those creepers and climbers design on them with some shiny glittering dots.. a popped out belly which was very carelessly covered by his skin-tight-fluorescent-red-colored-T-Shirt… The faint light inside the bus, didn’t provide any help to his dark complexion.. and on the top of it… he was wearing dark goggles.. Dreadfully over-sized for his juvenile fat face.. I was just hoping that this guy didn’t boast a girl friend.. because if he did, I would have died of self disrespect.. now I wish that he had one...

Just as I removed my hand away from his in a cavort, the guy quiet Rajnikantingly removed his gogs and placed them strategically over his head..(or forehead.. a small face makes it hard to discern..).. and smiled..

“I’m very sorry..” I smiled back.. DCE etiquettes shine on..

I guess his smile widened.. now I could study his yellowish, ghutka chomped, paan red-ened tooth.. he was wearing metal necklaces too.. I wish I had the camera to click those multi-colored tooth structure.. well.. the smile was anything but pleasing.. I smiled again and turned away..

There are occasions when some people stare at you and even without staring at them back, you feel him/her gape you..

That man.. the boyish-man.. hadn’t turned his gaze away.. he was looking straight at me.. and it was perturbing.. I looked at the closed window pane which reflected my face and searched for any funny faults.. but it was alright.. I could see him look at me.. without a single blink.. that irritating good-boy smile on his face.. I could see that in his reflection too..

why??.. why me??.. there are hundred others.. look at them.. IS she a girl??.. dressed like a boy.. no.. she wasn’t.. after battling with baffling questions and getting no fruitful answers, I managed to ask..

“kya hai??..”

words came out for the first time from my redundant spectator.. and what he spoke will be etched in my psyche for years to come..

“Jo tereko chahiye.. Wahi mereko chahiye..”..

That did it…

Hells broke loose.. I was horrified.. disgusted.. appalled.. it is hard to clarify the way I felt.. on one hand I wanted to punch this moron off the running bus, but on the other, I was afraid even to utter a single word.. I started pushing myself back.. towards the last seats.. and decided against giving any heed to the fatso.. and all this time he didn’t bother to look away.. all his attention was mine.. He got down at Akshardham.. Even while de-boarding, he turned back and looked at me.. But I didn’t move a single inch.. I got down at Noida More.. reached home, called the one I was visiting, and laughed the horror off..

Well.. I may not be good at judging people.. I may be thinking a way too much.. may be the line meant something else.. “jo tereko chahiye.. wahi mereko chahiye”.. may be he’s talking about a seat.. or a girl friend.. he he… whatever.. he didn’t know how to behave with people.. or straight people for that matter...

I have developed a certain amount of amnesty for homosexuals these days.. specially after hearing Raghu (Roadies) , that according to some philosopher, the ones who oppose or curse homosexuality are homosexual in themselves.. true.. why should we indulge into the likes and passions of some other individuals… Talking of India, if the films like Fashion, Dostana, gets an approval of public viewing, then who knows, the IPC may consider reshaping its section 377… but the straights should be left alone too.. Dostana must regain it’s true meaning..

.. no doubts the metro announcer reminds us everyday…

“kripya anjaan aadmiyon se dosti na karein”..

haah…

PS: Khanna.. thnx for the inspiration you povided to give birth to this post.. long live our Dostana..

Once Upon a Time.. in a Lifetym..

2009-01-07T22:19:00.009+05:30

Hey… My bloggy associates… The fresh Year is here.. (as if u didn’t discern..).. Happy New Year to all of you.. may all your dreams and wishes come true this year.. and may you all gain some mass.. well.. 31^st night was never this amusing… I mean, no parties, no orgies, no DJs can contest the feel I underwent rejoicing my 21^st new year.. Swami Ram Tirth ashram never appeared so splendid… My classmates never felt so balmy… I never had so much pleasure playing the six strings.. The blaze never seemed so inviting.. The World never looked so happy..

Well.. at around 10:30pm, girls got the consent to stay outside their rooms till 12.. Gupta and me cajoled the ashram guard to permit us the entrée to the woods lying in the backyard.. and at around 11:30pm, the flames began to shoot.. natives around, started filling themselves.. The entire horde clustered around the fire.. The chilly winds carried the poignant news of the demise of 2008.. the 2008 that will never be back in our lives.. the 2008 which had ups and downs for all of us.. but the fire presented enough warmth to declare the gifted arrival of 2009.. The baby was ready to open her eyes..

well.. I had no problems in clouding the frivolous brain with such fillo-sophisticated thoughts.. It was a moment when I hoped the clock was moving slow.. allowing me to live more of it.. Gulp it down… save it.. never let it go..

Jitendra started the proceedings with a spectacular piece of his own poetry.. the poem dyed the unique events of the year.. it was followed by songs from akash, nitin, dheeraj and me.. Songs of love.. Songs of life.. everybody joined.. it was like a dream chorus.. then Gunveer started the Countdown.. from 60…59…58…57… 3..2..1.. yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy…

All of us jumped up in the air.. the fire got brighter.. the smiles got wider.. the heart throbbed faster.. Good wishes were exchanged.. Hugs were passed on.. The entire ambience made us feel lucky.. The clear Dehradun sky welcomed us to the new year.. The unseen, unknown 365 days ahead.. It was time for some sound.. Nitin’s “Haishya”.. Gupta’s “ari ari ari”.. slogans involved everyone.. it was animesh’s birthday.. and I’m sure he’ll remember it forever... Even Raju Sir couldn’t defy the feel.. he also sang a few songs.. I mussay he is a fine Singer..( Thank You sir… for never letting us feel who the boss was.. you were more like a friend.. another student.. one from us..).. Following the DCE off-time sacrament, none of the girls returned to their rooms at 12.. and there were no one to push them back.. people answered the phone calls.. chatted around..

It was a memorable night.. but the Camp Fire night was triple the fun.. I’ll write about it soon...

Till then… Happy New Year to all of you……

..Late it Be.. be-letted..

Bhavnao Ko Samjho..

PS: excuse the author for the ungrammatical Title..

:)(:

Survey Camp 2008-09--- The Curtain Raiser

2008-12-22T16:39:00.003+05:30

Long ago, in the shadows of time, it was felt that the study of civil engineering was incomplete if the students were devoid of Mountains.. yes.. the mighty mountains.. People realized that it is must to practice civil engineering at a site, posed with maximum threats.. at a site, where the construction is most challenging.. at a site, where an engineer has to count on the limited available options and exercise them fully to serve the purpose.. the real-time engineering..
well then.. answering to this very cause, like every year, Delhi College of Engineering has organized the Survey Camp for it's third year batch of Civil Engineering, from 26th December 2008 to 4th January 2009.. some of the important information about the tour are as follows...

The venue of the Survey Camp has been fixed at Swami Ram Tirth ashram, Rajpur, Dehradun.
The buses(two nos.) for Dehradun will leave the college at 9:30PM on 26th December,2008.
Students must report in the Department of Civil Engineering, DCE, by 7:00PM on 26th December 2008.
Dinner for students on 26th December, must be arranged by the students themselves, and not by the management.
Students will be provided separate rooms where 3-4 students can accommodate.
The bedding will be provided by the management. But the students are advised to carry their own Bed Sheets and Shawls.
The aim of the Surveying project to be completed during the camp is, "To draw a topographic map of the given area".

The following is the day-wise schedule(*subject to change):

27th Dec,2008: Reaching ashram and accomodation. Site inspection.
28th Dec,2008: Surveying Work, Day-I.
29th Dec,2008: Educational tour to Chibro Hydroelectric project, Ichari.
30th Dec,2008: Educational tour to Tehri Hydroelectric Project.
31st Dec, 2008: Visit to Mussoorie and Dhanaulti.
1st Jan, 2009 : Surveying Work, Day-II.
2nd Jan,2009 : Surveying Work, Day-III.
3rd Jan,2009 : Surveying Work, Day-IV and Camp Fire in the night.
4th Jan, 2009 : Educational visit to IIT-Roorkee and return to DCE.

***The buses for the educational tour will leave from the ashram in the morning, and will return to the ashram in the same night.

***Students must report in the ashram, within a fixed time every night, else stern actions will be taken against him/her.

***Regular attendance will be recorded and anyone found absent will be seriously dealt with.

***If anyone involves in any kind of nuisance within the ashram, he/she will be sent back.

***Students will be divided into 9 groups and each group will be headed by a group leader. The group leader will be answerable to the coordinators about all their group activities.

***Work will be divided amongst the groups and a check will be kept by the coordinator.

***The marking will not be done solely on the basis of the Surveying work, but also on the basis of the involvement of the students in their respective group activity.

*** Cigarette and alcohol consumption during the tour will be dealt very sternly. Students are advised to stay away, as this may lead to severe damages to the marks they obtain in the 2-credit subject.

***We shall always remember that... this is not an outing, or just another fun-filled tour with our friends. We will carry the reputation of the college on our shoulders and we will be representing the shine that Delhi College of Engineering has earned over the years. So realization of this very fact will help us to behave in the correct manner. Special arrangements will be provided for the fun but fun should not never be mixed with chaos and mayhem.

***Wishing you all the very best and hoping that the tour succeeds to become a memorable hearty experience, this is Gangeyyo signing off...

DEHRA-DONE..

Let's play a game..!!.. anyone game for a Game??..

2008-12-15T21:30:00.003+05:30

The days of super-duper-nothings are fleeting so very fast.. What m I doing??.. It’s already been 15 days into the holidays.. half the month gone??..

“The five o’clock shadow over my face, makes me feel, that I’m having one over an eight..”..

whoa.. what was that??..

the drivers of my building are playing cricket..

cricket??.. at 9:15PM, they are playing cricket??..

ohh ya, today India beat England..

they must be celebrating the much unlikely victory..

but why are they making such a noise.. shall I go out to join them??. Or Shall I tell the guard to bash ‘em up?..

no..

leave them yaa.. lucky drivers.. they are the only ones in the ononion-colony who are having fun..

my fellow engineering friends are having exams..(why don’t all these colleges have a common exam??.. like the same old entrances??..)..

the DU ones always look busy..

and I don’t get any fun playing with school kids..

once I did..

but it was like Andrew Flintoff playing against Robin Singh..

Only play.. no talks.. never talk..

I guess it’s my inability afterall..

Perhaps, I now belong to the exclusive category of word-f***ers of CVR hostel..

(the ones who are delving into research papers these days.. their own way of having fun.. he he..)..

how can school kids contest that echelon??..

how can I even expect??..

so..

Don’t go out..

Pre-eminent preference..

In my pursuit of finding out innovative ideas to slaughter time(sittin at home), I came crossways to this scheme while remarking on one of my friend’s blog.. here is it..

U must have seen some letters which ‘they’ always ask you to enter before your comment is posted.. You’ll know, if you have ever commented on a post.. and if u aren’t blind( I came to know that yahoo came up with this proposal of letter verification for the first time..).. so the task for you is..

Type those letters and rearrange them to form a meaningful word.. if u cant, then it will be a challenge for others to soothe it.. lets see how it goes.. if we mount up many words, we can even join them to form a sentence..

Who knows, perhaps you can decode some precious secured piece information.. haah..

Hope everyone lives up to my expectation.. and play it judicially.. (nd hope m not the only commenter)..

PS: khanna.. your post was really nice… m reading it for the third time.. ppl who reach here, are advised to read “common room” as well. You can get the link from the comment “ritesh khanna” posts..

FOOD QUOTES..

2008-12-09T23:51:00.005+05:30

Eating is one of my most loved pass-times.. I eat merely to keep food out of my mind.. I get amused by seeing mothers running after their food-phobic kids, holding the baton of glass-full of milk.. and their nasty kids finding all the joy in the world to see the PT Usha in their mothers.. Perhaps because with me, the case has always been different or opposite.. My mom, never ever had to plead me to get something inside my mouth… I was born-efficient (at least in the ingestion department)… Cockroaches.. Wall lizard shits.. matchsticks.. candles.. merely everything I could see,(and hold) was eatable by my standards... I loved diversity, and I suffered a great deal for this habit of mine..

Being bought up in a traditional Bengali family (that too a “bangal”) I have always believed in the “life-in-the-lap-of-the-cook.. not god” phenomenon.. my taste buds have been efficiently looked after by the fantastic cook in my mother.. I appreciate food and I love eating(both quality and quantity)… back there in Bengal, whenever there used to be a marriage ceremony, people used to challenge each other on the amount they can fill.. chicken, rasogolla, luchi, were some of the easily edible items.. (my record??.. 17 rasogollas.. no wonder the Bengalis are the worst sufferers of all gastric ailments).. I have seen people gulp 47 pieces of rasogolla.. just to win a challenge.. (later the guy had to be hospitalized).. anyways.. life without good food is guitar without the 3rd string..

So folks.. here goes one of the recipes for all you rookie cooks.. I invented this thing 2 years ago and as my work has been appreciated by many across the (.. umm..mmmm.. ) family, I feel proud to share this..

take some freshly cut, colorful, good looking vegetables like carrot, onion, capsicum, beans, peas, cauliflower etcetera(avoid smelly ones like radish) .. half- fry them in mild flame.. then take them out and half-fry fresh neatly(and regularly) cut paneer.. now mix the half-fried vegetables and half-fry paneer..( hence making the combination full-fried.. ha!)..
now add suitable amount of salt.. and no other spices.. after agitating the mixture for 2 more minutes, pour enough milk.. add a little bit of sugar.. then leave the cooker closed for 10-15 minutes on medium flame..

after opening the lid, you can allow your nostrils to smell the wonderful aroma of whatever you’ve done till now… pat your own shoulders or ask someone else to do it.. transfer the mass onto a white colored bowel, and put a piece of butter over it and watch it melt down.. oh yeah!!..
you can even add coriander leaves to decorate the preparation..
believe me..
if you want to kill time, and you have a knack of trying new things, the kitchen provides a perfect base to your researches.. where you can per-mutate and combine-eat a world of things(edible) to produce something of your own.. something out of the ordinary..
you’ll get a high..

PS: I still don't believe that m actually posting a recipe.. ohh... no wonder m trying sooo hard to take my blog to every possible avenues..
and yess.. do suggest a suitable, colorful and tasty title for the dish..

.. The Cat and the Chinti(hindi)...

2008-12-02T22:40:00.003+05:30

Of lately, I’ve urbanized this peculiar knack of running after alienated English lexis… words that are infrequently worn in the tongue.. words that abide by no important meaning.. “I think it’s hereditary my son!!..” my father replied after I unveiled this bizarre yearn to him.. was he laughing??.. was he serious??.. whateva..

somewhat right... as an prying kid, I was often bemused at my father’s routine to enlist new English words.. I thought this was done to publish the “Sudhir’s Pocket Dictionary” which could hit the market anytime.. but that never ensued.. In class XIth, my father passed on that legacy.. that chronicle of words to me.. but within a few days of the dutiful ritual of “a-word-a-day”, I gave up.. Perhaps my wits preferred gambling into works by Mr. Issac Newton more than that of my own father.. But a few days back, my proclivity towards this new-words obsession, rewarded me with the following cited snippet.. which I found, was brilliant.. so thought of sharing this with my lingo-savvy fry-ends… m sure you’ll like this if you haven’t come across this earlier…

“I do not know where family doctors acquired illegibly perplexing handwriting nevertheless, extraordinary pharmaceutical intellectuality counterbalancing indecipherability, transcendentalizes intercommunications incomprehensibleness.”

I will be happy if you figure out the avalanche behind this sentence yourself..

So Ordinary...

2008-11-23T00:30:00.006+05:30

No.. I couldn't let this happen.. A month's exile from the blogger ville??.. No words to put up??. Nothing to write??.. How can this happen??.. the updates of my favorite blogs were ringing like door bells.. propelling random thoughts.. sequentializing special events. but how can anyone write when he is left at the mercy of Jiyoh-Technical Engineering?.. or the anal-threatening "Anal-ysis of Structures"??.. enough of the same old cry..

Every time I put together some rhyming words and connect them in a meaningful way, and end it with a proud signature followed by the date..and imagine like 200 years from now teachers in higher secondary schools will elaborate the thoughts behind the thoughtful poem to horrified students who'll find it so hard to judge the real meaning, I feel as elated as Yeats must have been after reciting his own love-poem to the person for which it was written.. like this is the best poem ever written on a piece of leaf.. I called people up to grant them the honour of being the first listener.. and when my ears got no negative airs, i thought to put this one up.. silly strategy..
hope u have enough patience to reach the end..
(M sure the Khannas and the Shekhars won't... ).
so here it goes..
so add some feel, you can gently pluck E-minor.. followed by D-major.. and repeat them..

..SO ORDINARY...

Dreams flying high... may they live forever
If I've done something good.. It's better late than never...
If I do a mistake.. I'll have no strains to say Sorry..
I just want to be.. So Ordinary..

Laughing out loud.. just to make you feel good..
Sharing your tears.. If only I could..
I understand thorns come up & life's not so flowery..
I just want to be.. So ordinary..

Just a little smile.. It won't cost me a thing..
But it should be even costlier than a big Diamond ring..
Being nice to people.. a warm hand shake..
And I'll always learn from my past mistakes..
Life will be so Good.. Life will be so Merry..
I just want to be so ordinary..

applauseeeee.. he he..

i'll be back..
&
I'll be front..

If courage is 10, the art to escape is 9.. or 9.5..

2008-10-19T02:13:00.003+05:30

Earlier I used to feel very bad when people overlooked to wish me on my birthday.. It felt as if I am no more than an amoeba to them.. I remember, I used to call people up the very next day, and throw them some cruel words.. so that they don’t forget to wish me the next year.. (starving for attention you see.. as I always am).. but things change… as they always do..

Date: 15th October
Time: 7:47 PM

On my way back from the Madhurima room, I was wondering life would have been so good if today was 17th Oct.. or if all of them forget my birthday.. or if I’m not going back to the hostel.. the gist of ship smoke on the horizon was changing colors with the beats of the thumping guitar on my back.. just then,
“Gangu beta… only four hours to go...!!”
It was Medhavin… Medhavin??.. Even Medhavin plans to kick??.. Gloomier…
“Somebody’s gotta get hurt real bad...” confirmed Sharad Sir.. hard to tell whether it was sympathy or a jest..
Well.. whatever that was.. this gave an ignition to THE PLAN…

Time: 8:00 PM

The unusually empty(..of 2K6/CE) hostel corridors seemed very appropriate.. Where will they search??.. Where won’t they??.. How far can I go??.. How far can they trace??.. I found out all the possible answers using my past mistakes and my knowledge of mate-psychology.. (Read: Ritesh Khanna).. It was working..

Time: 8:30 PM

I locked my room from outside.. Nowhere to be seen for next 12 hours.. he ha ha ha..
No less than an escape from the Alcataraz..

Well.. when you make a plan, and incase it thrives to serve the purpose, there’s no harm in revealing it.. Even if it’s a super-secretive effort.. People after you should get the benefit of your findings..
Thanks to the low-height hostel balconies, it’s always easy to move from one room to another.. I jumped into arup’s room and then into mine after making sure no one was passing through the corridor to watch my maneuvers… So here I was.. inside my room, which was locked from the exterior with no-one in the planet having the awareness of it’s inner presence… The next three hours I surrendered my time to his Excellency Mr. Howard Roark… During this time the mobile was silent.. I didn’t pick up any call (to prevent sound).. I messaged people bout my ill health and my running away to home... They believed my words after a thorough enquiry from abuhasam..
The clock struck twelve.. I started answering the calls.. I had to measure my words if someone from the hostel called up to wish.. Outsiders were given a chance to appreciate my super-plan..(which I named “Escapade”.).
At about 2 o’clock, after answering my well wishes (thnx to the harsh words thrown last year).. I emptied my second water bottle.. It felt nice… Nice to escape kicks from 40 odd people for about 40 even minutes.. (last years record).. Nice to save my tired muscles from the semi-merciless shots… and nice to talk to so many good old friends over the phone in such a short time.. as I switched off the light, there was a silent pat on the back,
“Happy Birthday Gangeyyo..!!..”


She's Here..!!

2008-10-03T17:59:00.004+05:30

Human beings chameleon-ize themselves better than any other creatures around… adjustment is like in our blood along with RBCs and WBCs…
Back in Kolkata, the month of October was the most coveted month… I used to linger for these days the whole year.. wandering in the jam-packed lanes, elucidated with arty light works with my brothers and sisters, stopping at every fast-food joint to have another round of “Fuchkas”(that’s what we call paanipuri).. appreciating the bravura of Pandals and the flamboyant Pratimas(idols) and whatnot, the hours passed unseen.. flouting the challenges posed by the drawn out holiday homework, I used to get imbued.
in the entire holy atmosphere..
The times have changed.. I’ve been planted to such a place where it’s not only difficult to find a Puja Pandal but even thorny to sense the ambiance.. But still.. The advent of Durga Puja takes me to a higher state.. I still feel the ting in my nerves when I think of it.. Perhaps that’s the reason why m able to stay happy even after knowing that I’ll have to attend regular classes.. perhaps I’ve attuned myself.. Perhaps not..
Well.. as this is going nowhere.. Lemme end this with the purpose of starting it..

…WISH YOU ALL A VERY HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS DURGA-PUJA…

THE BAMBOO EFFECT..!!

2008-09-20T21:07:00.003+05:30

Facing exams was never this easy..(only if I think of it now..).. Gone are those drill days, when citizens around used to worry bout the syllabus one-month before the exam.. and now??.. Somebody roused me up even at 6:30 in the cock-crow to inquire the syllabus of the exam we had that day.. well.. these changes haven’t been much hazardous though.. but my facade one week before exposed stress.. downright stress.. well, let’s come to the phenomenon now..

About 2-3 weeks before, when Proff Trivedi and we were sailing through the anxieties of an ill-fated retaining wall, (ya ya.. I was listening.. ) somewhere, he goaded a glint of curiosity.. I decided to go through the chapter myself.. So after our post-dinner-promenade, I decided to unlock the holy book and devote one prized hour.. Quiet calculatedly I fixed the show timing of “If-Only” at 10.. so that I could stay free in that one hour.. Hard-hitting ardor u see.. well..
quiet blatantly I accept, that often I question myself.. “am I worthy enough to study in DCE??.. if yess,, then for what god-damn reason, is this meager item snubbing to affect my brain cells??”.. That day was no exception.. at the end of the taxing session, I was only able to engulf the name of the person who designed the killer-idea.. Mr. Rankine..( and they say I, I have a strange name??..huh??..).. well the time was partly spent on imagining Jennifer Love Hewitt,, on the pathetic “bhej” they served that night.. on DT.. and whatnot.. I closed the book and decided to un-dam the ocean of doubts to the Proff the next day…( I didn’t do that..) Now, the dark before the appalling Geotechnical Exam, I was just circumventing the summit with Mr. Rankine once again… But to my utter astonishment, it got into my grey matter very unknowingly.. that too in the first reading.. It’s then that I realized the significance of the bamboo.. ( “the driving force” in good terms).. Had my blog been visited only by boys, I would have loved to describe the term more in details but I beg to stay brief...

and yes.. this partly explains the reason my blog went through an “agricultural” drought in the recent times though some parts of the country were getting flooded.. our hostels were playing upsetting games.. if there’s electricity, then there is no water… if there is water, there is no light.. if both are preset, there’s this bone-irritating noise of the.. (dunno what they call it..) floor plainer I mussay.. they just go on and on like busy-bees posing continual threats to the power of concentration.. Though the rains seemed convivial, but they acted more like Alzolam tablets.. inviting sleep.. which meant failure..
but I know.. this coming week.. I’m gonna miss this involvement,, and this pressure-cooker atmosphere.. I’ll miss the bamboo.. (End Sems are not very far away though.. oh how much I hate these ODD Sems..)..
and yess!!…Mr. Rankine didn’t feature in the question paper…

The Zany Turmoil..

2008-08-30T19:23:00.002+05:30

Politics was never my cup of tea... Being outright apolitical, my mind seldom ventures into the classified avenues of this perilous game... Honeyed backstabs, unequaled coalitions, (and other such traits a political star must posses) is not my strong suit… And that is why I avoided their offer. (At least I tried to...)

When Alind, Akash, Abu, Khanna were discussing the impending CR (Class Representative) elections of our batch for this year, I didn’t even have the faintest of the ideas that they were about to recommend my name… rather the previous night I was laughing at one of my friends, when she was explaining the mayhem over the CR elections in her college… I could not figure out how people could fight over the post which generally prefers to stay unoccupied in our college… But by some divine co-incidence, I was the one whom my friends felt could race against Salonee( my contender)… So like a deferential friend, the next day I filled up the form and registered myself as the second sprinter from 3^rd year civil engineering batch...

Thus began my election campaign.., (if u call it so)… Babbling remarks like,” arre yeh toh mass bunk nahi karwayega..” and “tujhse accha toh main hi bann jaaun…” started hitting my eardrum.. Some of them were indeed very happy at my decision and some were really not… I despised the fact that some were playing two roles… “There is no need to support me if you feel that I’m not apt for the job… But stop playing with words..”.. this was my reply to one of them… well the largest democracy of the World started showing true colors and I could very well sense it.. But the game was on.. I was in no mood to give up..

Salonee, my venerated colleague didn’t leave any stones unturned… I got to know that she had called people up to secure votes… On the other hand, I did nothing to convince people.. I tried hard to remain calm and behave like it was just another day… The entire week I was just myself and frankly I can say that the fear of loosing the elections didn’t bother me much… I tried to visor the tense look and I wanted people to vote by the virtue of my 2-year impression… Finally the day had arrived… It was 27^th August, and there were 50 students present in the class when Kongan A.R called me up to deliver a speech “for two minutes”… this is what I remember I spoke….

“Hello class… you know me… This is supposed to be my first election campaign and I’m standing here in front of you to compete against my dear friend for the post of C.R…

All I can say is that.. m very lucky to get a batch like you.. a batch with ppl of all kinds.. From kidos like Abu to sagacious Arup Ghatak… From ppl like Ritesh Khanna (everyone laughs).. to those like Alind… It’s like a beautiful bunch of my favorite persons… and it will be my prime honor to serve you all as your representative..

Wishing her good luck, I would like to call Salonee to speak..

Thank you..”

Mannn.. I couldn’t believe that I had just spoken ill-equipped (though it took meager 40 seconds).. But I could see people listening to me (more than they listen to Hydro lectures).. I could feel their attention..

Then began the voting.. People took turns to write either ‘G’(for me) or ‘S’(for her).. Anticipation knew no bounds (and there was no salvage to the nails of my little finger..) it was then that I realized how badly I wanted to win.. a defeat by a distaff comrade seemed like a curse.. And sitting at the very last desk in those 10 minutes, I had just lived the most anxious 10 minutes of my life…

After 50 students, the proff called both of us and stated counting.. I remember the faces.. It will be like photographed in my mind for times to come… everybody was uptight.. the ambience of the room revealed thrill as the two boxers were hitting vote punches on each other… 1-0.. 1-1.. 2-1… 2-2.. lubb dupp.. lubb dupp..

The results were announced after that exhausting session…

I had won 29 votes to her 21…

Once.

2008-08-15T22:03:00.005+05:30

Lemme tell you guys..(i) I don't share the common amnesty for English movies (didn't like The Dark Knight much)..(ii) Unlike some of my pals around, i love to criticize english movies more than the Desi stuff..(remember patriotism..??)..(iii) i don' get enamored by (generally stupid sounding) reviews of foreign films.. (iv)and never did i fancy a chance to write about any movie because of a simple reason.. there are just too many of them.. untill yesterday, when I laid my eyes upon this masterpiece...

well.. if you do some research, ONCE will be earmarked as a romantic musical drama.. but the movie crosses every definition of genres... at first you may raise doubts that whether it's a movie at all or just a handy-cam equipped director, shooting steet people from a range.. busy streets of Dublin have been acutely potrayed with background songs of a busker.. Glen Hansard plays the role of that busker.. there have been many movies in the past in which the actor lends his voice for some songs of the movie..(appun bola tu meri laila..). but here, the singer himself plays the role.. without revealing much about the storyline, all I can say is that this movie is "one-of-it's-kind" types.. the week-long story explores a person's hope, passion, compassion, emotions, romance and above all the love for MUSIC.. and yess.. there are full chances of a perspective clash.. some of them who joined me for this (a mere 85 minute runtime) movie quitted mid-way.. but the only term that comes to my mind to define them is "unfortunate"..
so.. clean up your minds and do watch this slow masterpiece.. I will be glad if i can convince even one of you..

and after watchig it.. if you do some researches..(only for vellas like moi).. you can find lines like::

"Bob Dylan was such a big fan of the film that he arranged to have the two leads, Glen Hansard and Marketa open for him on part of his world tour. Hansard and Irglová also covered Dylan's song "You Ain't Goin' Nowhere" for the I'm not there..."
happy viewing..
this film went on to win the OSCAR.. watch this..::
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qx8yLvb0gZM
:)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Not another East side story...

2008-08-03T16:13:00.003+05:30

The day before yesterday when i was standing by my open window, feeling the fresh raindrops on my cheeks and examining the algorithm of 'water logging' in New Delhi roads, suddenly my eyes fell upon the bus 165, which was unloading it's passengers... it's the bus which connects our anand vihar bus adda to Delhi College of Engineering.. though i avoid the bus journey(thnx to DMRC) but still it reminds me of college every time..and soon I realized my vacations were about to end.. I started recollecting the happenings of these not-so happening months..
The trip to Kolkata to attend Babinda's marriage gave my holidays a kickstart.. Seeing my brother (whome I've known since childhood) tying the knot with a lovely lady, pumped up the balloon of excitement in me... the entire shining ceremony of a typical Bengali marriage never fails to shape the polenta of astonishment.. that's when you start perceiving that the turn to get YOUR lovely lady isn't too far away..(yess.. i can never suppress my yen to get married!!.. i was in class three when i publicly announced the fact for the first time..)
Returning back.. I enrolled myself with Parsvnath Developers and worked on a glitterati titled project.. Mr. Mukesh, the project engineer under whose control i surrendered my (2 years) experienced civil engineering brain taught me some important on and off-field concepts of civil engineering and asked to love the branch GOD has chosen for me.. Though his words sounded philosophically buttering, but somewhere deep down the wise man was speaking logic..The 21 long days training came to an end in just a blink of an eye.. and for the first time I saw the working place of a civil engineer..
The next chapter was filled by my colonial cousins-- Sailesh, Ankur and Vedant.. Three of us used to land up at ankur's place to strum our guitars.. Though they termed it as their "guitar training" but i preferred calling it 'jamming'.. they unleashed the teacher within me and started taking lessons.. It became a nice unwinding process after a day-long-stay under the Sun and i gladly offered all my six-stringed knowledge to them.. they were quiet satisfied i guess..*though i didn't get any testimony.. :)
How could i forget the best thing that happened to me in this tenure... Thats BLOGGING.. I appreciate Animesh( his was the first blog i read) and Medhavin( 2nd,3rd,4th,,,,,) for bringing me to .blogspot.. Being a talkative boy.. I was blessed with the inability to write less.. Once my teacher commented "Thoughtful" on one of my articles and awarded me 6.5/10.. So I wasn't sure whether it was an accolade or a criticism.. But this so-called thoughtful writer got a nice place to garage his feelings nd perhaps for the first time someone outside his teacher-circle commented... it felt so nice to let the world know how he feels..
The rear parts of the vacation was spent either watching movies or planning reunion party with school friends..
Strange.. Strange as this seems to me.. just a week or two back i was dying to get back to the college.. dying to live in the hostels.. longing to be free once again... but as my stay at home is coming to an end, I'm not that avid anymore.. Those care-free snoozes till 10 in the morning.. The lovely morning tea served with my Mom's affection.. Dad's motivational discourses to rescue me from my regularly irregular studies.. the deliciously cooked meals.. the late night leg pullings of my online frnds.. I'm gonna miss all these there.. staying with the family has it's own benefits.. though I'll be just 2 hrs away from them but still.. and so mellifluously the babbling questions like.."whatcha doing these days??".. or "kaisi chal rhi hai training???".. changed to the likes of "so.. when are you coming??".. and.."when is the registration??..".. only as indicators of the bout-to-end vacations..
Though my body has grown two months old but the brain inside has changed a lot i guess(y not??.. m now a THIRD YEAR student.. such a heroic fact..) over these vacations.. My perspective has changed.. this shouldn't be misunderstood as boasting as I'm yet to judge the changes myself.. A tough year lies ahead and like last year,I have plans to get serious..

I got imbued by these thoughts for over an hour by my window.. The rain had stopped... The clouds had gone.. The new clear day was in the view.. such a welcoming sight..
open the gates DCE...
m coming..
:)

A Saturnine introspect..!!

2008-07-25T01:05:00.010+05:30

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

::a blatant confession::

the following content is an upshot of exposition to motivation provided by the likes of Rang De Basanti (thnx to my cable operator).. Swades.. Nayak.. and several others.. readers may have read similar babbling articles but the writer wishes to put forward his rendition...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sometimes.. irascible topics cross my head and beset the poor inane brain of mine.. not only does it cross, but it intervenes with other germane thoughts as well... Everything that happens to me after that, just falls in the right place.. so as to concave all my sapient attention to the topic... now that i've started blogging (inspired by my sagacious friends), i hope my thoughts will find a nice dwelling place..

I remember in the days of my childhood.. when my elders or my teachers asked me about what i wanted to become in life, my reply was the most devious one... without scaling the weight of the question, quiet unknowingly i would declare..,
"i want to become a soldier!!.."
the fights, the battlegrounds, the guns and bombs.. they all used to lure me more than anything..
And then... quiet unknowingly this answer vanished one day.. The vacuous reply was succeeded by more shining and becoming ones..
"Doctor!!"..
"Engineer!!"..
And in the process the soldier in me died..

well.. now I am twenty years old... I call myself a part of this "white white orbit white" generation..I am at the genesis of my specialization and my country looks upon me as it's hope.. as it's future.. But am I really worth??.. Am i really the one who dares to change the rules.. who dares to swim against the tide??.. i get no answers..
Mr. Kennedy said, "Never ask what he country does for you.. but ask what can you do for the country".. and at present, I am nothing more than a noone to my motherland.. My life at present is as desultory as the boat with a lunatic captain.. i don't even know what I am doing.. a good pay pack.. a good score in the A,B,C.. ATs.. a nice sweet partner.. new clothes and apparels.. is all i care about at the moment.. The topper(no offence meant) of my batch wants to secure a government job for himself just to earn that extra under-table transaction.. My friends and seniors are stepping outside the country to enhance their skills but they never want to come back.. Will they ever come back??.. no answers again..
Though I am more than 18 years old, i don't even share the basic responsibility of voting for the right government.. all my basic amenities are supplied by the nation but deep down I know that I can't give my life for it.. i don't ever dream of becoming another DJ.. or another Mohan.. the valour in me is simply missing..and quiet blatanyly i have accepted that.. and I'll be lying if I say that I never dream of settling abroad like many of us.. So does that mean m not patriotic??.. does that mean m an irresponsible citizen??.. unanswered again..

All i know is that i feel on top of the world when India wins a cricket match.. i feel proud when I see the tricolor amongst the others in Olympics... i never hesitate to strum some open chords and dedicate songs to my motherland on Aug 15th.. I abstain from lying on 2nd October.. But is that it??.. are these the qualities of an ideal citizen??.. i stop questioning myself.. they all go in vain..

Friends.. It's always better to light one candle than to curse the darkness... these repercussions of the nationally-disturbed mind wants me to come up front and battle against our miseries.. the paralyzed political frame wants me to mend it.. the social evils wants me to eradicate themselves.. but m clueless bout helping them.. my brain defies my mind.. maybe say after 10 years when I read this blog I'll just give it a sarcastic grin.. but right now.. my thought needs to be recorded..
i wud like to end this never-ending conflict from where it all started...
few days back the newspaper read the following lines..

"the moment we start taking our freedom for granted.. we become our own slaves.."..

thank you..
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

....THE CIVIL COMMON ROOM.....

2008-07-15T19:13:00.000+05:30

::disclainer::
All the characters and places mentioned bear complete resemblence to their respective owners whether they are living or not non-living.. Parental discretion could be hazardous as the blog is solely meant for non-kidos.. Readers may find certain objectionable words to boost their vocabulary(of slangs) for which the writer needs no appreciation..

......DCE HOSTELS...

..present..

.. a story..about NO-thing..

.."THE CIVIL COMMON ROOM"..
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"he must be asleep!!".. huffed P.C
"impossible!!".. said the other guy as he banged another hard kick to the mighty door which stood in front..
This attempt didn't go waste..
"kaun hai chu(beep)..(rather beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppppp)..." came the reply..
The voice carried a bag of emotions.. it was affirming as the speaker/shouter was quiet sure about his guests.. it was helpless because he knew that he just had to open the door..(the kickbag)..and had to publicize his very own privacy..and at last it was grating or howling because it had to match the quality of those Mara-dona kicks on his poor door..(already in bad shape)..
well... the emotional shouter was none other than the very famous..(rather scandalous) Khanna.. alias Ritesh Khanna.. BCH-127 his piece of land @DCE was haunted by two intruders and he couldn't do anything but open the door.. but he tried something of a scarecrow stuff!!..
A boy.. wearing a sleeveless (smelly) T.. a flowered nicker.. (or was it an underwear??..)..stood in front.. distorting his facial features to pose the worst possible look in his book..the wanna-be alien managed to ask..
"what??..."..
those two gatecrashers didn't even bother to throw a glance at his efforts.. and entered the blessed room... actually none told him that his normal face was much more scarier.. so all his shots to contract his facial muscles went in vain..
The room... it was shambles top to bottom.. right from the dense spiderweb on top.. to the spilled pepsi on the floor.. every element in the room fought their best to fill the empty spaces.. it was khanna's way to evade visitors.. no space.. no more dwellers.. was his policy.. even the air greeted them to some mysterious gases, coming from some unknown poisonous source(s).. above all there were four more laughing faces inside..
Pulkit( shares the room)..Abuhasam( mmm..shares this room too!!..).. Ravi Shekhar(scares the room).. and Baba-alias Alind( tames the room).. it was friday night and all of them felt like brave warriors after defeating "Building Construction and Materials".. the next exam was on tuesday.. so it was Party-time...
P.C(bajaj..ved bajaj.. varun ved bajaj)..passed a comment in his unique way..
"it's really difficult to get inside khanna's room.. but once you get in,, it's very difficult to get out..".. the statement was followed by one of his special hypocritical grin..but alas it soon vanished..
the angry gatekeeper drenched him in his exquisite slang collection while bolting the door..and delivered 3-4 sentences through which he conveyed that how easy it was for him to get some1 like P.C out of the room..
P.C was unmoved.. it's been two years since khanna has been showering his best, newly-learnt, modern slangs on him.. he experiments with new ones and tries them on P.C to check the harshness.. P.C has got used to these like water.. he could almost sense their arrival..
Khanna's laptop was playing one of the "good" movies which was enough to glue the guests.. everyone except Mr. Pious abuhasam were sitting on khanna's cot to adore the scenes and pass comments which even the cannes critics dare to pass.. Clean guy got lucky and managed to find a BC PUNMIA- SURVEYING out of the pile and revised his concepts..
The new guests were warmly welcomed by the bed-holders and were offered seats.. "the duck tales show" was going on.. though everyone had seen it several times.. but still.. a revision was always greeted.. The show ended in 5 minutes.. Khanna switched off the laptop straightaway..hoping that this unfriendly gesture would be enuff to goodbye his visitors..
just then.. there were three back to back bangs on the door.. someone out there was in some hurry...
"kholl be...". it was narendra..better known as technical bak(beep)..
Baba opened the door to the 6 feet monster which just refilled it's well-like stomach with triple half-fry from the night mess.. and was jumping with excess energy which was reflected in his toothy smile..
"kitna padh liya be??.".. he asked baba..
well.. they all knew.. it was narendra's way to get charged up.. which he terms as.."complex lena".. during exams everytime he meets baba he fires the same question with an aim to get a mind-boggling reply like.."poora khatammm!!",.. or "sabb ho gaya".. and he follwoed that with his cursig-himself ritual.."damn..i haven't even started!!"..By this he used to pump up confidence in himself.. tough philosophical enginering indeed..
though unwillingly,, baba started counting the chapters..and fill confidence in that balloon..
soon after 10 minutes.. everyone in the room got busy with each other.. P.C dared to switch on the laptop.. "rock you like a hurricane" handled the sounds.. abu and pulkit started solving previous years problems as ravi watched..
IPL matches.. sania's T-shirt quote.. Narendra's chance of havin a girl-frnd and crying at the fate of that girl..abu's bike.. a plethora of topics crossed the discussion table..
the hour passed unnoticed.. they had stepped into the next day.. at around 12:15am, P.C reminded them of resuming studies.. He climbed up to the third floor with the other guy and waved goodbye after discussing the chords of "rock you like a hurricane".. they decided to meet at 3 to "fetch a pale of water"..
just as the other guy unlocked his door..someone uttered a word from inside.. it ws.
..."shitttt..!!"..
the syllabus booklet for which he went downstairs 2 hours ago, still lied on Pulkit's table.. he desperately needed it... so he decided to go back to the ground floor and reached 127..
"knock knock...!!..bang..."..
"kaun hai (beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepppp)!!??.."..
another two hours??..

not- the- end

.................................................................................................................................................................................

BCH-127.. the room which belonged to narendra in the first year became famous spot on.. after narendra, the legacy was passed on to khanna under whose reign the popularity reached unsurpassable heights and became a piece of jealousy to the ppl of other brances..he he.. enuff boasting..

in short.. it was a place where some of the dangerous minds of a gifted department came together.. my second year days were ornamented by this room.. only selected ppl dared to enter it.. but regular members had real fun.. once a student was quoted saying.."wish i was in civil too!!..".. such was the shine, such was the impact of the room..

a blog dedicated to this room was necessary.. firstly coz i neva want to delete the memories.. secondly it was the perfect "escape mechanism" i've ever had.. KFC tours.. Birthday bumps.. walk the "mtero walk"..goosebumps over horror movies..jumping in the College fests.. friday dhaba special.. everythig was planned here..
so.. this was the story about nothing.. wanna come over??..
you're welcome..

:)l(:

THE GHOST OF TRISHUL..

2008-07-04T07:07:00.002+05:30

I don't remember the exact date... But it was in the month of may'06.. WBJEE was faced, coming up was DCE's CEE.. this story is bout a notoriously hot and irritatingly humid night.. I haven't disclosed this before.. neither to my friends (to avoid gettin bugged) nor parents (to avoid bugging them)..

so.. lemme explain the scene.. as i said it was super hot.. withstanding delhi summers is far more difficult than doing a nude rampwalk.. it's anything but comfortable.. it's a time when even your vests seem to be xtra clothing.. when the volume of water comin out of our pores is more than what goes in thru ur mouth.. without deviating more, lemme come to the point..

there i was.. sittin in front of the mighty table lamp (which lit my entire room).. the old philips radio playing songs of kishore kumar.. the cooler and the fan were busy in their "jugalbandi".. and yess.. the open math book by mr. suraj, inviting me to turn it's page (whn u r stuck in a problem nd it takes time.. even the book gets bored).. though my parents made all efforts to cool my 'hot' body.. but challenging all their endeavours, i was sweating like a pig.. they could easily have featured me in the advertisement of Voltas air conditioners..(suffering like him??.. use Voltas).. those days of preparations require a special mention.. in a special blog.. IITJEE was a mishap.. aiEEE was disaster... IP was unfaithful.. so doing well in DCE's CEE was time's call..(in which i flunked again).. but still.. finishing another round of drying myself with the poor 'rumaal'..(which was already wet).. i looked at my latest attempt to solve that monster of the problem.. as if some faiy wud come out of those solutions and guide me through... seriusly.. sometimes i wonder.. i will wake up someday.. and I'll get a pencil..a pencil which writes only correct things.. i just have to put my hand over it and show it the problem to be solved.. it will then write the correct solution on it's own.. aah these sweet dreams often get broken by my mom's shout to wake up..

but here i was not asleep.. i browsed my solution for a probable mistake for the last time and just as i turned the page to venture into another monster.. the light went off.. Ghaziabad Development Authority is most punctual in theses things i guess.. they shut the supply lines at twelve in the night.. they don't miss even single a chance to harass.. their punctuality is so worth that people here adjust thier watches with their timings of power cuts..(I mean if the light goes off in the night, ppl will adjust their watches to 12pm).. and you tend to forget about all the power shortages.. nd energy crisis.. nd everything else when it goes off.. the first thing u do is.. curse them.. coming back..

I sat there like a still body.. The operator lives in 14th floor.. he gets down and then switches on the generator.. so it takes time..( for which he neva escapes the slangs thrown silently)..

no movement.. no sound.. The room was alive till then.. there was this cooler-fan combo rhythm.. there was kishoreda.. there were vehichles in the bus adda which sounded like chirping birds.. but now... it was all silent.. no light.. no ears.. it was like two of my sense organs were not functioning.. I got off from the chair.. went to the balcony.. The Ganga apartment was like a dark mountain.. their guard didn't swich on their generator either.. i searched for the moon in the sky.. but it was nowhere to be seen.. The beautiful view from my balcony..seemed scary that night.. i felt uncomfortable inside and decided to come back in the room..

As i reached the balcony door, the strangest of feelings passed my nerves.. it seemed like something.. or somebody,.. was blocking my way inside the room.. it stood itself just at the entrance.. like a child who gets haunted by the "aahat" episodes, i shoot my hands in the air(probably to get it/him/her out of my way).. nd almost ran my way in..

huffing.. nd ctching my breath back..( dunno why..) i sat on my chair.. it was crazy.. it's only then that i realised that no sound was coming from the usually noisy bus adda.. it was completely dumb.. i didn't want to go to the window to check that out.. a howling moan from somewhere very far.. dogs crying.. evrything was like trying to scare my a** off.. my throat was dry.. but there was no water left in the bottle.. so i decided to walk to the kitchen to refill that.. it takes few steps to reach kitchen from my room.. and i cud hve walked that journey evn in no light.. but still quite surprisingly rather spookyly.. i struck against a wall.. this petrified me to the deepest bone.. i crawled my my way back and equipped myself with the lone weapon I had.. (every brahmin kid has).. i grabbed my sacred thread in my wrist.. and started chanting the gayatri mantra closing my eyes though it didn't make any difference as it was xtreme dark..(yeah.. i was downright religious too)..

After a few minutes my ears responded to some familiar sound.. the cooler and fan resumed their beats.. kishore kumar was succeeded by rang de basanti.. as I opened my eyes, the table lamp greeted me to light.. which I was dying to see.. Without moving a single piece, without producing the faintest frequency, I succumbed to my bed.. i remember i didn't even turn off the lamp.. the poor peice glowed the whole night.. mr. suraj had to see that same page for the entire night..

the morning came unnoticed.. as i woke up the next day, went to the balcony.. the beautiful view of the east delhi roof calmed me down.. there was the same old noisy buss adda.. I neva cursed it's noise after that night..

..QUOTED TODAY..

2008-06-27T21:42:00.002+05:30

hey friends..
this world is a strange place to live in..
our desire to get more than what we've got has made us a master of all the species around...
so it's our goal to achieve more for the betterment of all..
so here goes this one right from my Grey matter to charge you up..(hope it does)...

..gang says,

"always remember... Even if you raise a 1000 storey building.. u can't avoid the fact that it's roof is the floor of the 1001st storey.."..
cheers!!..
:)

An eye Opener!!..

2008-06-24T22:43:00.004+05:30

my summer training at the arthala construction site has reached it's final stage.. with only 3-4 days of minor work left, it's more like attending college lectures just for the sake of attendance..

but today a strange thing happened...

As my stay at the site was going to be short-lived, I wanted to explore every inch of it... Those places which I had never paddled as they had nothing to do with my project were like calling me at my every glance..Frankly I couldn't suppress my yen to visit them..

So when the site engineer asked me to take the day's final stroll around the site, i straightaway headed towards the carpentry area..

Huge blocks of wood were cut along their cleavage by the muscular blows, and later hammered to plates of ply.. but my interest lied ahead..

"jhuggis"-- the dwelling places of masons, laymen, workers had always caught my attention.. I always wondered where do they live.. those who erect handsome multi-storeyed lairs for all of us.. where and how do they live..??..
the answer lied a few steps away...

I saw the open gates of their "house".. and i couldn't control myself to enter into one of them.. clueless of what I was going to see inside..

There was a bed..(charpayi).. over it was sitting a middle aged man.. with a plastered right foot.. There was a child (or should I say a newborn) sleeping on his lap.. On the ground there were two more babies.. with a plate in front of them(empty).. Their mother was sitting nxt to them with another plate(not empty).. She landed a tight slap on one of those babies (the girl).. which was perhaps what she got when she asked for another roti.. she started crying.. her only statement of protest against her mother’s bash.. All these happened in a glimpse of an eye.. As I stood at their gate blocking the sunshine (the only source of light to the room) everyone looked at me.. The mother became a bit conscious (rather irritated) at the sudden advent of a foreigner.. The girl didn’t stop.. The man sitting on the bed tried to get up placing the baby aside (he mistook me for a site engineer).. I signaled him to sit down..

His name was Raghu.. while working on the B block on a rainy day, Raghu slipped off the scaffolding and broke his right leg.. Doctors had advised a bed rest for 6-months.. but in the hunt for food, he joined the work after 2 weeks.. only to injure his mighty right foot once again.. Now the doctors say that if he hurts that again, the leg has to be removed… which means that the only source of income of the family will get blocked (jst like I blocked their door)..

Raghu paused at the cry of his daughter..(poor girl, got another slap I guess..) his eyes were moist.. it’s only then that I realized that how much more painful were his tiny tear drops to his daughter’s loud cry..
He used to work 12 hours a day on the site.. and was paid Rs.70 each day.. with which he afforded three children.. Hoping that they will soon grow up and support the family.. and one day he’ll leave this jhuggi and settle somewhere outside.. outside this site area, where he’ll breathe fresh air every morning before going out to work..
“Lekin abhi kya karein saab??”..(but what will I do now??)..
“Inko fainkh bhi toh nahi sakte”..(I can’t throw them out)..
his innocent eyes full of grief against his own fate had engrossed me..

I was listening to his plans, his past life, his association with the “thekedaar” like I was listening to a story.. And I think that even he enjoyed having a patient listener beside..

I stood up as the phone rang..

It was Ma..
She enquired whether I had taken my lunch properly or not..
After answering to all her worries, I looked at the watch..
It showed 5:25.. (25 minutes over time!!)..
As I waved good bye to Raghu and his family, I saw his girl splashing water to her brother outside their jhuggi.. Her laughter filled the air outside.. I was glad to see her happy face..
As I counted my steps back to the exit gate, I recollected today’s breakfast when I threw a parantha away to save time.. a little peep into their open gate brought me face to face with one of the hardest truth.. and it was as draconian as the merciless hammer blow which penetrated the nail deep inside the smooth surface of wood..
After narrating the story to ma after my return, she said a simple sentence which summed up the events in a salutary fashion,

“chalo.. m assured that you’re learning something good out there..!!..”

I worked over time indeed!!..

First Love!!..

2008-06-18T21:30:00.000+05:30

it was around 2:15 in the night... our tired voices had given up.. enjoying the zephyr on my room balcony i said..
"I've written a poem.. on my first love.."
"waoww... why didn't you tell me before??.."
I was glad that this issue had recuperated her from the sleepy mode..
"sunaun kya??.." though i knew the answer, i asked..
"what are you waiting for??.. please sunao.." she had indeed recovered..
so i started unfolding that piece of paper which i had kept in my wallet..
..

There was a boy...only six years old
Two front tooth gone... so sweetly!!..
Fell in love.. with a girl in his class
Even though.. he couldn't spell it correctly..

Her smile so pure.. her look so fresh.
He wondered.. "is this an angel??"..
Her green eyes shone.. like two polished pearls..
This was the feeling.. He never felt..

He shared his lunch.. he shared his books..
Just begged.. for a sweet little smile..
Wanted to shout.. but didn't have the guts..
"O girl.. You are mine..!!.."

They grew older.. day by day..
same happened.. to his feelings..
Perfumes, Deos, Hair gels..
Tried everything to do a stealing..

Somewhere down there.. she also likes me...
That's.. the only hope he had..
Always in some act.. to impress her..
Friends... called him a mad!!..

Marking the days.. she had talked to him..
"she laughed".. "she sat beside".. even those too..
Though his feelings.. were to their fullest..
Neva spoke.. a word or two..

One thing.. he never ever noticed..
There were many others... who liked her..
She picked one up... from all those stars..
His angel.. With some other master??..

He cried a lott.. no tears in his eyes..
He still wore.. the mask of laughter..
Pulled himself away... from the girl 'o dreams..
But never tried.. to tell her..

Now he sits.. in a whole new world..
She own his "first love" credit...silly??..
Fell in love.. with a girl in his class..
Even though.. he couldn't spell it correctly!!..

"aahh.. she is a lucky girl.." was her first comment..

Anyways.. You guys..
We all fall in love.. rather rise in love.. I admit, in my school days, falling in love was like a process with a constant time period... Had a new crush every week.. Once i started thinking seriously,,
Bang!!.. there came another girl..
well my tryst with girls was never too good.. But the first one.. the one with whom i started off this journey.. the journey of crushes.. needs a special mention.. Partly because she has taught me to loose.. loosing something precious.. (which has made me stronger)..
And partly because.. somewhere in the mines of my heart, i still adore her as i used to..
This one's for you DEAR..
:)

The DCE Muzic Video..(Music)..

2008-06-18T01:51:00.000+05:30

I remember that evening very well... two strangers came in akash's room where akash, varun(P.C) and me were already sitting.. they showed us a slide-show kinda thing on their laptop.. it was a collection of pictures of our college with a background song("rockstar" by Nickelback)..
Unaware of their coming proposal we didn't take their stuffs too seriously... Then one of them started.. Medhavin.. The shorter one with backbrushed hairs.. xplained what they wanted from us..their dream..
A song for the Music Video..
A video depicting "life at DCE".. We all were surprised at their proposal as the general notion was that "transit guys are boring".. but these boring guys thought of something worth..
Though unclear of the entire scene we agreed.. like served with hot rasugulaas..
The next day came Manu.. our transit representative.. come a fellow composer.. come a heavyweight academic champion..(P.C became a fan.. spot on).. He explained the whole story..bout that guy who comes to DCE and grows into a man in four years...
Then started the most fundoo job of penning the lyrics and giving tones.. i admit that we were a bit childish at first..
"ghar se hazaroon..meel door..

... batade mujhe raaste"..
and we're done with the first paragraph..
those random thoughts..those false acting to evoke emotions(for the right words).. the never ending search for fresh tunes.. everything seemed very special..we felt no lesser than the famous trio of
Mr Shanker, Mr. Ehsaan nd Mr. Loy.. and at the end of our first sitting the title was fixed..
"main college aa gaya hoon.."...

that was february 2nd 2007..
the days which followed saw us working very hard like it was our end sem exam.. the college lectures couldn't see us at all.. compiling the college life in four concrete paragraphs was not a child's play..(tho we still were vry childish).. bunking classes became a phenomenon.. returning late at night after practice and welcomed by Alind's annoyed face(coz i used to wake him up) was not a pleasant sight!!..
But we managed it..

And finally after a mere 15 days of (A.R) Rehmaning ourselves, we were ready to give our child the fist take(studio)..
Manu went online.. and we came to know about Soundgardens at Greater Kailash..

Mr. Rahul opened his gates and for the first time we stepped inside a fully featured recording studio.. Ghossh!!.. It was like.. leave a foolish person inside an ATM just to enjoy the A.C and the way he behaves...
we surrendered ourselves to the sound engineer for the entire day.. It took a little more than 12 hours to give the .mp3 format to whatever we created..
and after the CD was handed to us titled
"...main college aa gaya hoon...
by Maksang"..(That's our name..Manu+Akash+Gang).. told ya we're childish..
an unusual feeling passed our nerves.. the joy of creation.. the joy of achieving something.. not for your own's good but for the rest...
i remember manu nd me singing "hum kiss gali jaah rahe hain"..at our highest voice..while returning.. in the streets of Greater Kailash and the local guards giving us a dirty look..(we woke them up!!)..
Then one fine day the video was released... during our "engifest 2007"..

(the creators)..
I'll neva forget those days of second semester..
thank u all..
(i was too long i guess)..

(the crowd at the launch event)!!.. OAT Full..

and here is your chance to watch the video..(4 free)..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dM8JX5Pmn9c
hav fun!!..