Monday, January 26, 2009

Bon-HoMo-EEE..


Some things in life reside perpetually… even if you crave to forget them, still, they fancy remaining super glued to your grey cells.. they turn up at certain events and leave that slight grin on your face.. the grin that reminds you of how disgusted you felt, living that moment.. They are bad experiences.. you never want to live them again.. and every time that memory pops out, you are left saying, “Oh!!.. How foolish was I..”

Well.. I have been jammy enough to breathe some awful experiences.. I was caught red-handed while “using” the staff toilet(ladies) in school.. I was convicted of writing a shitty love-letter to a girl of my class, who happened to be the daughter of a senior teacher… the crime I never committed.. Words will fall short if I start mentioning all of them..

But the one who sits at the top, will surely get the limelight.. This thing happened about a year back.. so.. celebrating it’s about-anniversary, I’m going to narrate this unfortunate yet funny yet seriously disturbing episode.. it was my first encounter with a Homo…(kids.. leave the page now!.)

Winters 2007.. freshly out of the torturous third semester exams, we all were desperately trying to kill time.. have fun.. go out.. enjoy.. it’s very often that I plan an exhilarating holiday well before.. and nothing ever happens..

I met my school friends in Mayur Vihar and signed them goodbye by 7:30pm.. my exterior wasn’t that eye-catching.. Un-brushed long curly hairs were un-wholly matched by the misplaced unbalanced goatee of mine(only if you call it.. I Call It..) a bus was going to drop me at Noida More from MV.. and another would take me to my place..

The bus arrived.. jam-packed.. hardly any space to stand.. I got into the bus (I love packed out places).. I managed to stand beside the conductor’s seat, near-the-rear door.. just as the bus began to move, I raised my hand above to hold the overhead rails.. THIS was my only mistake..

Well.. my hand didn’t touch the rail first, but another hand.. There was a short baldy guy, standing just beside me wearing a Denim Jacket.. very very complicatedly designed..(Fresh out of Paris.. haah).. a jeans with those creepers and climbers design on them with some shiny glittering dots.. a popped out belly which was very carelessly covered by his skin-tight-fluorescent-red-colored-T-Shirt… The faint light inside the bus, didn’t provide any help to his dark complexion.. and on the top of it… he was wearing dark goggles.. Dreadfully over-sized for his juvenile fat face.. I was just hoping that this guy didn’t boast a girl friend.. because if he did, I would have died of self disrespect.. now I wish that he had one...

Just as I removed my hand away from his in a cavort, the guy quiet Rajnikantingly removed his gogs and placed them strategically over his head..(or forehead.. a small face makes it hard to discern..).. and smiled..

“I’m very sorry..” I smiled back.. DCE etiquettes shine on..

I guess his smile widened.. now I could study his yellowish, ghutka chomped, paan red-ened tooth.. he was wearing metal necklaces too.. I wish I had the camera to click those multi-colored tooth structure.. well.. the smile was anything but pleasing.. I smiled again and turned away..

There are occasions when some people stare at you and even without staring at them back, you feel him/her gape you..

That man.. the boyish-man.. hadn’t turned his gaze away.. he was looking straight at me.. and it was perturbing.. I looked at the closed window pane which reflected my face and searched for any funny faults.. but it was alright.. I could see him look at me.. without a single blink.. that irritating good-boy smile on his face.. I could see that in his reflection too..

why??.. why me??.. there are hundred others.. look at them.. IS she a girl??.. dressed like a boy.. no.. she wasn’t.. after battling with baffling questions and getting no fruitful answers, I managed to ask..

“kya hai??..”

words came out for the first time from my redundant spectator.. and what he spoke will be etched in my psyche for years to come..

“Jo tereko chahiye.. Wahi mereko chahiye..”..

That did it…

Hells broke loose.. I was horrified.. disgusted.. appalled.. it is hard to clarify the way I felt.. on one hand I wanted to punch this moron off the running bus, but on the other, I was afraid even to utter a single word.. I started pushing myself back.. towards the last seats.. and decided against giving any heed to the fatso.. and all this time he didn’t bother to look away.. all his attention was mine.. He got down at Akshardham..  Even while de-boarding, he turned back and looked at me.. But I didn’t move a single inch.. I got down at Noida More.. reached home, called the one I was visiting, and laughed the horror off..

 

Well.. I may not be good at judging people.. I may be thinking a way too much.. may be the line meant something else.. “jo tereko chahiye.. wahi mereko chahiye”.. may be he’s talking about a seat.. or a girl friend.. he he… whatever.. he didn’t know how to behave with people.. or straight people for that matter...

I have developed a certain amount of amnesty for homosexuals these days.. specially after hearing Raghu (Roadies) , that according to some philosopher, the ones who oppose or curse homosexuality are homosexual in themselves.. true.. why should we indulge into the likes and passions of some other individuals… Talking of India, if the films like Fashion, Dostana, gets an approval of public viewing, then who knows, the IPC may consider reshaping its section 377… but the straights should be left alone too.. Dostana must regain it’s true meaning..

.. no doubts the metro announcer reminds us everyday…

“kripya anjaan aadmiyon se dosti na karein”..

haah…
PS: Khanna.. thnx for the inspiration you povided to give birth to this post.. long live our Dostana..         

10 comments:

Gangeyyo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
pri said...

haaha... it was very funny.. you shouldn't have kept it inside you for so many days.. and i guess we all have such encounters sometime or the other.. well.. the last para carried meaning.. typical gangvani...

Swayam said...

good lord.... haha... I am all for homosexuality... I mean why should somebody be condemned for their choices as long as it does not hamper somebody else's living space... and its funny to see how indians are so bloody riddled with double standards... homosexuality is a no no but fuck buddies are ok... And well the reasons sighted by the female on the show was down right preposterous...

protocool said...

Your article was a breezy read and more of a concern for me as i am an activist or supposedly so...

I know these incidents completely creep the hell out of any individual straight or gay...

No one would like any uncle, aunty , kid or fat dog from backyard to force themselves on others in a sexual manner with a wide grin running from ear to ear and drool dropping all over the floor...

i believe in individual freedom and am fighting for my rights, it is such behaviour that places section 377 out of fear in our law books... am glad still you believe in individual freedom of choice... most people just start hating everyone remotely gay if they have been hit upon....


And if it helps in anyways i am all to support straight or gay people in getting rid of their exploitation by cheap, lusty, frustrated individuals like the one you encountered... My advice for them go hump a doughnut... rather a medu vada ;)

Aanchal said...

i think u were, for want of a better word, adam-teased........im sorry but i couldnt help laughing while reading the post..........it is a very funny incident.............the philosopher mentioned on roadies, by the way, is sigmund freud.......and yes, i totally agree with swayam......

*still giggling*

Gangeyyo said...

@pri..
thnx for the appreciation.. but i seriusly hope against having such encounters..
:)

Gangeyyo said...

@swayam..
you r right.. live and let live...
:)

Gangeyyo said...

@protocool..
commendable thoughts my man.. i too feel the clumsy indian mentality is behind all the prejudices and the lac of freedom.. the thing that happened in mangalore just proves the very sorry fact all the more.. well.. this will change.. let's vow..

Gangeyyo said...

@ @@nchal..
thnx for giving the name to the incident.. adam-teased.. he he.. simply gr88..
keep smiling..
:)

Hiral Trivedi said...

I would like to quote Ayn Rand here..."The smallest minority on earth is the individual. Those who deny individual rights cannot claim to be defenders of minorities."